Five Ways to Deal with Your Emotional Pain It’s overwhelming! It’s depressing! It’s consuming! It’s your emotional pain. Emotional pain is something that everyone faces, leaving no one immune to it. If not dealt with, emotional pain has the ability to infect your personality and affect those surrounding you. Briefly in a more illustrating way, consider this. Emotional pain is a wound of our feelings and just as an unattended physical wound is vulnerable to infection, our unattended emotional wound is vulnerable to infecting our emotional stability. An infected physical wound can actuality disease the whole body. As an interesting fact, if direct contact is made with a physical infection, the infection can be transferred or spread on to others. In most cases as our emotional pain festers we began to spread the infection, transferring our pain to a more defenseless person, like our children. But how do we deal with emotional pain, is it possible? Recognize the Pain Exists – It is so simple for us to recognize physical pain. We inflict pain, we identify the pain, and now we move forward to healing that ache or pain. Emotional pain is like the whipping wind. You can’t see it, you can’t touch it, but you sure can feel it! Just because we can’t see the pain, does not mean it is not affecting us. Are you angry, depressed, frustrated, sad, and do these feelings consume your personality? Are you over indulging to find some form of satisfaction, yet you only to find emptiness? Then recognize, you may have emotional pain unattended to. Confronting the Source of the Pain –No one likes confrontation in any form. And if you do, then chances are you may be suffering from unattended emotion pain. Confrontation causes great conflict within us. No matter the length of time, once we bury the pain, it takes strength to let it resurface. For instance, our mind can tell us that we have dealt with an issue because we have buried it. But like a powerful ticking time bomb, is it less likely to explode because we have buried it? If the source of your pain lies in the hands of another person, confront yourself first, then confront the inflicting person. It is important that you are concrete and clear with yourself as to why you are in pain and why you chose ignorance over acknowledgement. Doing this builds backing within yourself that is needed to confront the tormentor of your soul. Be Specific – Being specific is easier said than done. If I trip you and you hurt yourself, you may feel compelled to tell me, “You hurt me!” I in turn say, “How?” You then could follow by saying, “When you did what you did.” I return with, “What did I do?” And so on. Not only is that exhausting, but you may have let the other person build up a defense, which may lead to no resolve and more emotional wounds. But recognition is important here to. We have to recognize the reason we do not want to be specific is because of the power the other person may have over us. But what if we find our source of pain is with ourselves? Then the pain itself has power over you. No matter where the pain originates, BE SPECIFIC! Start by saying, “You hurt me when you ___________________, this was very painful to me.” By being specific about your pain, you are placing it back with its originator. Purge Yourself- Southeast Texans are familiar with purging crawfish. When purging crawfish you are cleansing the crawfish from the inside out. It is the same thing with emotional pain. Because it is inside us, we have to cleanse ourselves from the inside out. The best way to do this is to cry. When discussing this step with other people, I find myself thinking about the song, “Not gon’ cry”. People have a tendency to believe that crying expresses weakness. Crying only makes the emotional pain realistic. In other words crying gives physicality to our emotions, so not only do we see, but others can now see our pain. I like to think of not crying to express pain, as washing a dirty car not using water, what’s the point in doing that! If you feel moved to tears, let them flow. On the same album as the previously mentioned song, there is another song, “Let it flow, let it go”. Acceptance – Acceptance is at times a misrepresented word. Some feel acceptance is forgiveness. Others feel acceptance is forgetting. While many think acceptance is receiving the good and bad in a situation and not letting it affect you any further. And the truth is all these are forms of acceptance. Acceptance in a painful situation is doing whatever it takes, whatever you mental state calls for you to do to move on and learn from your pain. Acceptance is very valuable, it reaps many rewards, and tells you a lot about yourself. Understand that just as a physical wound takes time to heal, so does an emotional wound. Smaller wounds may take less time, than larger wounds, but all takes time. Your time has not been wasted if you truly are focused on dealing with your pain. Comment and tell us what does dealing with your pain mean to you? Visit re-rightinglife or follow me @ariererighter
Posted on: Wed, 14 Aug 2013 21:46:53 +0000
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