Focus on your child! Children are a great blessing from Allah. With their tender hearts, children can be molded into righteous people only with a positive and tender approach. Islam considers children to be an amanah (trust) given to the family and says it is fard (obligatory) for the family to raise a child in a righteous manner. One should not favor one child over another. In Islam, both male and female children should be treated equally and should be loved and cherished. The children have certain rights over their parents; it is the family’s obligation to shelter, feed, clothe, educate, support, nurture, and love them. It’s common sense, but, ironically, the truth is that ‘focusing on children’ is often not focused on. Children’s initiatives such as: ‘Daddy l have made a flower’, ‘Look, I am a butterfly’ are often not responded to with zeal. They are either ignored or superficially tended to with statements such as: ”Okay”, ”Uhu” and the like. These are the types of responses we would hate to receive from our children… Even though parents may not pay full attention to their children, they do want their children to pay full attention to them and when they don’t, parents will make that very clear. ‘Look at me when I am talking to you!’ is one of the phrases that are commonly used. Communication, however, is not learnt by mere instruction. It is very much learnt by observation and imitation. Think about accents for example. When a person moves to another city where people speak with a different accent and he stays there long enough, he will start to speak with a different accent without even realizing it! This is the unconscious influence of other people’s communication which psychologists also refer to as modelling. So if we want children to show us respect by paying attention to what we say, we have to learn to pay attention to them.
Posted on: Mon, 06 Oct 2014 07:44:41 +0000
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