***From A Reader*** NO BASHING!!! Let me just start off by saying that in some rare cases I dont believe the once a cheater always a cheater. I was a cheater. I had an affair for almost 2 years. The first time it happened I immediately told my husband, his reaction surprised me because he acted ok with it. I expected him to blow up on me but he didnt, instead he went to work and came home as if nothing had happened. I felt like he swept it under the rug, when I tried talking about it he didnt seem interested. But my cheating didnt stop after just that first incident, it continued for 2 years and my husband claimed to know nothing about it. Finally, I came clean about the affair completely, because without a doubt that was the worst thing I have experienced emotionally in my life. It literally eats at you every second of every day. (I guess if you honestly have remorse about it) He promised me we would work on things and try to get our marriage back to good standing as it had been strained for nearly 3 years at that point. I completely stopped talking to the guy I had the affair with and honestly really focused on my husband and the life we wanted together. But a couple weeks had passed and honestly I was feeling the same way I was before the affair, I felt like I was giving my all but he wasnt. And then I looked at our phone bill and noticed that there was an unusual number that popped up every so often that I didnt recognize, I blew it off not thinking anything of it, because overthinking and accusations is a place that got my mind in the mess it was in before the affair. However one night when he was suppose to come home from work he didnt, an hour had passed so I went to his work looking for him. I pulled up next to his car and then see him jump out of another car sitting next to his with a look of guilt and disbelief on his face. I guess I shouldnt be surprised, after all I had an affair for 2 years, surely when I wasnt putting out for him he would find someone else. Sure enough he had been sleeping with a girl he worked with while I worked. Even after he told me we would work on things he was still seeing her. He promised me he would never do it again but he refused to get another job to get away from her and that made me feel like he made his choice. I ended up leaving him after a week or so of me finding out he cheated, and I can say without a doubt I feel it was the worst mistake I could have made. Two wrongs dont ever make a right and although that was his second time cheating on me I shouldnt have been so hypocritical. Hes with this girl and has been for over a year now, shes the best part of him or so he says. I of course tried to give it a go with the guy that I cheated with but it didnt work out. (Big shocker) but I think my biggest regret was that I didnt try EVERYTHING I could have to make my marriage work. We may have still ended in divorce but at least I would have the satisfaction of knowing we did everything we could. I will honestly regret cheating every day of my life. It changed my life in a way I never imagined. At the end of the day I can honestly say though that I know for a fact I will never cheat again.
Posted on: Sat, 25 Jan 2014 20:45:00 +0000
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