George Anderson 10:22am (10 minutes ago) I’ve often found in speaking to bereaved people that their religious beliefs are usually the first casualty in their lives after the loss of a loved one. Many people have told me that they felt “betrayed” by the God they worshipped, gave thanks to, and worked to live up the tenets of their faith. But it all comes crashing down after loss, and sometimes is very difficult, if not impossible, for many of us to reconcile ever again. Years ago I stumbled across a quote from Native American author Vine Deloria, which states simply this: “Religion is for those who are afraid of going to hell. Spirituality is for those who have already been there.” I think no truer words can be found to describe what happens when those who have such faith find it slip through their fingers like sand when it cannot surivive the test our grief will surely give it. But having had our faith tested is perhaps the most important opportunity to learn what it is that we really believe. Take heart if you feel your faith has abandoned you. It actually hasn’t. Spirituality has begun to take over, and is filling in the gaps between what we have learned and what we now know. Our faith may tell us there is a place our loved ones will go when they are finished with the earth, but it’s our spirituality which makes the knowledge that they are actually alive and there ring in our heart. We learn from our loved ones who are working so hard to send us the messages our brains may not understand, but our heart surely will--they that continue, and that the bond of love has not been broken. I’ve also found that after sessions--after people hear their loved ones, and it reaffirms what they already know in their heart to be true, that faith begins to come back--slowly, at first, but it does come. Knowing that we haven’t been forsaken by God, and that there is a plan in place greater than we can ever comprehend from our limited knowledge here, goes a long way in filling in the gaps of uncertainty. What develops is a new kind of faith--one that isn’t just blind trust, but is now infused with our spirituality and understanding that those we love don’t simply disappear. They continue, as we do, until we see them again in a perfect world.
Posted on: Tue, 22 Oct 2013 14:37:08 +0000
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