Group Input Needed: Can you please post anonymous? I am new to this group and I am glad I found it. I can relate to a lot of what is being said on here. I am in the middle of a custody battle with my ex, who I believe to be narcissistic and possibly have a personality disorder. He has never been formally tested though. About 1 1/2 years ago my ex threatened to kill me (he is licensed to carry a concealed weapon and does carry a hand gun) and my family in front of our 2 1/2 year old. I ended up fleeing the area and getting a PPO against him. He is the chief probation officer in the county that we lived in. I went to my parents house, where I grew up, which is about 4 hours from where we lived. I tried to file for divorce here, but he filed first and everything is taking place in the county that we lived in - at the courthouse where he works. I filed for the judge to recuse himself and for a change in venue due to my ex working at the court house and the judge denied both requests. The county that we lived in is a joint custody county or they give primary to the parent that stays in the area generally. The results from the temporary custody hearing were 50-50 two weeks with me and two weeks with him, despite his threat and PPO. Trying to co-parent with him has been a nightmare. He constantly threatens to take me back to court if he doesnt like something, he has cancelled DR. appointments for our child that I made during my parenting time with her, threatened to cancel her daycare here, he refuses to give her medicine prescribed by her pediatrician and he constantly tries to bully and control me through his threats among so many other things. I realize I can not control his behavior and the court system can not make him be nice to me. Next year there will be a hearing to decide if our child will go to school here where I live or where he lives. I am struggling with the fact that despite everything that my ex has done and the fact that I feel like I am the better parent and can give her the better life, that the judge will say she needs to go to school where he lives because that is where she was born and I will be forced to move back to that area - An area where neither one of us has any family or support system, an area that causes me fear to be in the same community with someone who threatened my life. I am also struggling with - should I just make the decision to move back to the area to be selfless so that our child will have both parents in her life regularly rather than miss out on one parent due to the distance between us right now? I am fighting because I feel that her being with me primarily and attending school here is what would be best for her, but still having visitation and access to her father. Is anyone going through a similar situation? Any advice would be very helpful
Posted on: Thu, 22 May 2014 19:38:14 +0000
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