Hi! This is a rant I posted about in center hemo as that is what I am doing for the second time in my life. I think it will strike a cord with many of you. It was not written for pity but to educate others on what many of us endure. And... No home hemo or PD is not an option for me so please dont suggest either... Here goes: I am so very thankful dialysis exists for without it I would not. Rant starts now: I hate this place. I hate the sounds, the smells, the fluorescent lights. I hate these uncomfortable chairs and having to keep my arm still for hours with two huge needles shoved in it. I hate so many here have missing digits or limbs. I hate the pain and suffering all around and within me. I hate the hours lost here that I could be spending with those I love doing things I enjoy. I hate that I get close to people here and they pass away. I hate that I cannot share my hopeful news of a possible transplant with fellow patients because for most here that is not an option. I hate this disease. I hate how it disfigures us. I hate how this process wipes us out. I hate these huge needles and the blood all around me. I hate that sometimes I bleed forever after they remove my needles. I hate when I start bleeding again and blood shoots everywhere. I hate this diet and how difficult it is to find safe foods. I hate that a few tomatoes or potatoes can stop our heart. I hate that I cant drink beer 😜😜. I hate that I can only travel on weekends because I dont trust another clinic with my fragile access. I hate this disease and how it effects my entire family. I hate that this disease does not get more attention or funding. I hate that the disease I have is apparently not a popular illness with the press. I hate that more people do not see fit to sign an organ donor card and share those wishes with their family. OK I feel better now and am ready for my 4 days at the lake. I hate virtually everything about this but the fact that I am still alive trumps all of it. Have a great day and please consider signing that donor card💚💚
Posted on: Mon, 21 Jul 2014 22:28:58 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015