I am a typical man in some ways. Ill spill things and let it evaporate naturally instead of wiping it up. (thats the way god cleans up messes) Ill pretend I cant hear my wife if shes yelling for something Id prefer not to do. Ill drop my things in the middle of the kitchen table and leave them there. But I dont blatantly cop glances at attractive women when Im out with my lady having dinner. Its just that high code of conduct I was raised with. As a typical man I have learned when it comes to women, the way out of trouble is never as simple as the way in. Well this weekend my conduct was questioned. (That cant be, not you?) Yes my wife got angry and accused me of staring at this ladies butt. Now Im no angel, Ive checked out a caboose or two in my time, but this time I was as innocent as a new born baby. Ill explain: We were at the restaurant, eating in the bar area at a small table. This patron; what I would call mildly attractive woman was standing two feet from away with her back to me, or should I say butt to me. I noticed she had her big purse over her shoulder and some type of cord running from it into he back pocket. It caught my eye. Very much like dangling a piece of string in front of a cat. I was trying to figure out what the heck this cord was all about. (its the same thing Mark Harmon on NCIS would do) Well my wife was in the midst of some story and she saw me checking out this ladies butt and went to Def-Con 3 on the angry meter. She says you could at least pretend to listen to me instead of checking out that ladies butt. I went into save my keister mode and told her I was not checking out that butt, but was checking out that weird cord going into her butts pocket, besides that, I was pretending to listen to you. (That didnt sound right did it?) I told her the only behind Im interested in is the one sitting directly across from me. When it comes to butts that lady can put a tent around her circus, I only have eyes for you. I dont think she ever believed my story about the purse and the cord, but it was true. As Ive told my son, when your mom gets angry, try and keep things under control. Remember anger is only one letter short of danger.
Posted on: Mon, 17 Mar 2014 16:53:55 +0000
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