I have been trying to process this morning for about five hours now and I may still be at a loss for words...we will see! Today we were supposed to attend the Voice of Healing conference at Christ for the Nations in Dallas. Last night we received word that Heidi Baker had carved out a sliver of time for us to meet with her privately. We were (and are still) completely overwhelmed by this. I had heard a lot about her from Joseph after his trip to Africa and to be honest, I was a little nervous AND excited. She and her husband have been missionaries for over 30 years and have a plethora of stories and insight on mission work. We have only known Christ for eight years and were called into the mission field a little over two years ago. I was having to constantly rebuke satan and not compare myself as utterly inadequate to her. That would be like a five year old comparing themselves to a fifteen year old and feeling frustrated that they are not as mature. Thats not what Father wants. We are each perfectly and uniquely made and He pours out His gifts in His perfect timing. She opens her door and steps out to greet us with a hug. It wasnt just a hug to say hi, it was enveloped with pure love. As she poured Joseph a cup of coffee, I shifted around on the couch like a nervous schoolgirl. I had ridiculous thoughts going through my head like...do I cross my legs or just cross at my ankles? Do I sit on the edge of the couch or sit completely back like Im relaxed? Silly questions! Heidi sat down beside me and placed her hand on mine and said, Tell me about yourself. I want to know about you. Oh, and how are you feeling since your procedure that you had in June? Every concern that I had faded away and was replaced with passion to talk about Father. We only had a short amount of time and a lifetime of things that we wanted to share and learn. If I wrote down everything, you would be reading for a VERY long time so I will share the two instances that carved a place in my mind and heart. Heidi made the statement about going wherever God calls us without fear. I felt a sting of conviction. I need to let go of that last string that I hold onto. When I keep my gaze steady and level, common sense can take over. Thoughts begin to creep in like, That doesnt make any sense. When I keep my gaze upward with only Him in my sight, all of the worldly things become insignificant and He becomes all encompassing. Godsense takes over! A joy and love that is incomprehensible overflows from every part of our body spilling over into every aspect of our lives; our words, our actions, how we handle stress, how we handle adversity, how we handle each other. I realized today that some things (well, actually most things!) that I take to heart and wrestle with are minuscule in the grand scheme of what it is that He is doing. That needs to change! The second thing that she said that resonated with me was that we are like engines. What happens to an engine when it runs out of oil? It seizes. What happens when we are not filled with Him? We burnout and seize...our light dies and we become immobile. How important is it to be filled with Him? It is eternally important! There is no job more important than sharing God with your neighbor, a coworker, a person on the street, a person in a different part of the world...whoever and wherever it is that Father asks you to share! NO FEAR! Joseph and I feel so encouraged and excited that the Africa door is still open! YES! Praise God! If all works out with the visas, we will be there as soon as the boys finish the schoolyear. I rebuke the fear of the unknown and the fear of the plane ride and I stand firm Father that wherever You are is where I want to be! Thank you for Your blessings and allowing us this time today to be filled with love, encouragement and excitement for the things that You have in store for us! Amen.
Posted on: Fri, 19 Sep 2014 22:45:10 +0000