I have decided that the last 2 and a half years I spent in a relationship, was the worst mistake I have ever made. I let it destroy me, my job, my home, and all the opportunities I had in front of me. I cant believe I cared about and sacrificed everything for someone who never cared about me. Im not capable of pretending to love someone. I just cant do that. Either I do or I dont. Im glad he got what he wanted out of it, with no regards to the damage he was doing.I didnt think I could get past it, and I know Im not over it, but one thing is for sure, trusting someone else is going to be hard, he has made me suspicious of everything someone says to me. I have nothing left to offer anyone though, so Im pretty sure I cant be used again! And if there is anyone in the world that can make me forget he ever existed, its a certain person I have loved for my whole life it seems, and I dont hope to have anything with him, but he still makes me feel those butterflies when i hear his voice. I wish he could have been around when I met the last one, and I can guarantee I would have never looked at the last one twice! but live and learn..... love and a relationship just isnt meant to be for me. Or if it was, I screwed it up wasting my life with a con. He is just a smooth talker, with all the right things to say, to get what he wants. He swears he did love me, but actions speak louder than words, and his actions over 2 and a half years tell me quite loudly that I was nothing but his way to get what he wanted. And when he didnt need me to support him anymore, or his habit, he left. He never did anything for me, just me doing it all. He never cared about my safety, never cared how i felt, just how much money i brought back. He is a predator of women, and i feel so bad for the next one, she has no idea how bad its going to get, how many times her feelings are going to get hurt, or what she is going to have when he is finished with her, cause he is going to go wherever there is someone to take care of him, and when she is broke , and has nothing, see ya! he makes me sick to my stomach, and makes me feel so stupid that i fell for his shit. karma will come for him tho, and i hope im around to see the outcome.
Posted on: Sat, 06 Dec 2014 16:11:35 +0000
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