I just wanna share my every day sadness with you,because you,my magic friends,you were always here for me and my babies (fostered and strays) ,you are the only ones that can really understand what happens to an animal lovers heart ... I want to appologize that i wasnt so active on facebook lately but i have times when i try to do so much,to help as many babies i can and i forget that i am all alone here in the real life :( Sometimes is just too much :(( i feel that i am not good enough...i feel that i should do even more...but i just cant :(( i feel empty and tired sometimes :((( i hate this feeling ! Every day i try to find ways to rescue and help more babies from the streets ,especially now when winter is here...oh,how i hate winter time :((( is like the strays doesnt have already too many problems ...it needed to be cold too ...in winter time they need to struggle to survive,to fight with every day dangers...in cold :((( My mom is always saying that when i will die,i will die of heart attack ...but i cant chance who i am...i cant have limits...love doesnt have limits...and i truly feel that this is my meaning in life,to love and help animals! I dont wanna change,even though i cry my eyes and heart out many times :(( Right now i feel desperate and dissapointed and mostly overhelmed because i really dont know how to manage things...the vet bills are increasing every day,i need to pay lots of things for the babies from the clinic (Tessa,Pepsi,Pepper,Freddy,Fiama,Lennox,Boris and Paco) ,the montly accomodation is not covered because they need treatments and food,litter,dewormings,defleas,vitamins,vaccines,neuterings etc...and when i finnaly raise some money to cover a big part of our vet bills,i realize that another month passed away and i freak out because i am again in the same situation of habing bog vet bills to pay :((( Besides the babies from the clinic,i have also the babies from the kitty apartment (Ghery,Vampi,Remy,Mona,Lillu,Bamby and Angelo) and i struggle to pay the rent from few donations and also what i manage to sell around here :( they need food,litter and sometimes treatments too,pills for worms,spot-ons for fleas...we also need to pay the electric bill and other bills :( There are also the kitties from the poor familys yard that im trying to help with food,vaccines etc...they are counting on me :(( I also have 3 dogs(Ari,Maronel,Zorro) that need me and i feel like i failed them :( they need homes,they need food,vaccines ,dog houses... They were taken by dogcatchers and i was helped to pull them from there .They are safe now but they need so many things and two of them are really old...God knows...:( :( :( And not at last ,there are my strays :((( my street angels,how i like to call them ! My beautiful street babies that every night they are waiting for me to bring food...they know the sound of my car and they are running to me,some waiting patiencely to put the plates in order and serve them their dinner,some are too happy to see me to eat and they prefer to just cuddle with me first :( Every night i stay outside with them at least one hour to be sure that everybody had enough food ,we play together ,we cuddle and after that they leave to their unknown homes...like,under cars,basements,trees and God knows what other places they might find to feel just a little bit safe so they can sleep :((( Every night i go home with a broken heart...their eyes...:(( their meows...:(( I just wanna help them all! I just wanna see them all happy! I just wanna see them all enjoying the warmth and love of a real home...a real family ! Tonight i want you all to meet two of my street angels : Paris ( 6 months old baby girl ,the one eating from the plate) and Albu ( an 8-9 months old boy ,the one cuddling at my feet) ! Both Paris and Albu are super sweet and friendly and they always leave after i leave :((( They used to be not friendly but with small steps and lot of love,attention and nice words,they begin to trust me and to love me! They are now very friendly and i realized...they are just babies looking for some love and attention...looking for a human touch...looking for help :( I have no place to take them now and even if i did...i dont have no money to do it...and the sad part is that i will not be able to help them or other souls until i will pay all my debts :( I would love to take them inside...i would love to see them sleeping in a warm kitty bed ,without worries and with full tummies and not under cars ,in cold and with dangers at any step they take :(( Now,because winter is here,they need healthier food to keep them strong and we need supply of food because when the snow will come i will not be able to use my car and go buy too much food at once :(( They need help,they need good wet food and dry food as well :(( I have around 15 street babies at this point and my heart breaks for each and every one of them :((( Sometimes i wish i wasnt born (or at least not this way) so i couldnt see and feel all this suffering and saddness every day... I just wanna live in a better world for animals...:( :( :( They did nothing wrong :( :( :(
Posted on: Fri, 28 Nov 2014 01:34:56 +0000
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