I look at Nigeria, I look at Africa and I see so much hate everywhere. People talk about love, sing about love, write about love even celebrate love and paradoxically hate is everywhere in abundant measure. In homes, in offices, in neighbourhoods, communities, in nations, hate is so common, so many haters, too much hate. Isn’t it ironical that many who claim to love you in reality are more in love withthemselves and only truly love what you do for them, how you make them feel and benefits they get from you? And when I think about it, I can’t help but wonder why you will be upset if forexample I promised to come and see you after closing hours at work, but couldn’t make it because it rained or I was tied down in the office. The only reason you’ll be upset I think, is not because I offended you, it’s simply because you missed the pleasureand gladness and maybe benefit of my coming hence, you’re upset. Your upset is really about what you expected from my coming and didn’t get which provesmy coming was more in your interest than our interest, your satisfaction is more important to you, than my comfort and convenience and wellbeing. Hmmm For example, why should your first reaction and conclusion be anger and disrespect because I couldn’t pick your call when you called me? Why were younot concerned? Worried if I’m ok, or justconclude I’m busy? Why should you think I’m ignoring your calls and taking you for granted? I’ll assume your claim to love me is really about how I make you feel and the pleasure of my companionship, careand cooperation and what I do for you, it’s less of what you can do for me, giveto me or sacrifice for me. I am an individual with dreams, ambition and desires. I have good traits,I have strengths too and I’m unique in my own way. But like everyone else, I’ve got my flaws, very many faults andstruggles; just like you too. Please someone should pay attention to my strengths and powers and gifts, please celebrate these good traits for once, compliment me, say something nice about me, encourage me, motivate me inspire me, please stop celebrating my flaws, my weaknesses, my strugglesand my stupidity. Please stop reciting my weaknesses anderrors of the past; stop recounting my frequent mistakes to make you feel good, stop using me as a therapy for your own flaws thinking and being gladyou’re not as bad. Yes, you can tell it to anyone and recite it to yourself, I’m bad, I’m bitter, I’m mean I’m unreliable, but you see, that’s what I have, that’s what I get from friends, family and the society every day, that’s the way people treat me, I can’t give what I don’t have, I don’t get love, I don’t have love how can I give love? I’m lonely, really lonely, I need you to see the real me and love the real me; struggling very hard to drop my bad habits and overcome these weaknesses,please tell me the truth, tell me I’m not allgarbage and there’s something good in me; something good about me. I need you to help me out of my weaknesses, extend your hand and help pull me out of this self-hate. For once don’t think about your convenience, put me first. Try and tradeplaces with me, stop judging me, criticizing me and condemning me. I know I have my bad sides, I’m soft, i keep going back to that exploiter and hater out of desperation for attention. I know I’m weak I know I’m messed up, it’s all in search for love, so please don’t expose me, cover me, don’t disgrace meor embarrass me, I’m already ashamed of me, I don’t even love me anymore, I don’t think I deserve it, please don’t prove me right, tell me I’m wrong thinking this way. I may have failed again and again, disgraced me and all those close to me, Iknow, I know, please don’t keep telling me. Who can love me, like I really need to beloved, who can set this my broken spiritright, who can love me out of this mess I call my life. I need my hope, my dreams, my goals back; I need my life back, who can love me. Hmmm We all need love, we all need to be loved, we are too into ourselves, pursuing personal dreams, personal goals, personal gains, personal ambition, and everything has become so personalized. In the process we hurt, we disappoint, we betray, we cause many to cry and lose hope. We as a people are a collection of beings with strengths and weaknesses. No one is absolutely perfect and flawless. We all carry our baggage in different measures. A growing society, a better society, a thriving society, a prosperous society issuch in which the people, though awareof the weaknesses they all carry individually and collectively, pay more attention to the strengths, the gifts and talents they all carry individually, encouraging, motivating and supporting each other to be the best at what they do. In advanced and world class nations, everyone is on the lookout for unique gifts and talents, abilities and capacities and collective investment is made, in compliments, encouragement and motivation to see that this talent carrier fully expresses him-self or herself. Isn’t it funny that a man defeats an opponent in for instance a game of wrestling in a small city somewhere in the US and he’s called the world champion? And you see a teenager say to friends and family that he hopes to be the number one athlete in the world someday and the first reaction from themajority is laughter and mockery; how sad. In our country all it takes for all your praise to turn to shame is just one, not two just one silly mistake. All it takes for a footballer never to wearthe national jersey forever no matter his past accomplishments is just one silly mistake, all it takes for the coach to get fired is just to lose one critical match, all it takes for a governor to lose his popularity and praise is just one unpopular decision, all it takes for a pastor to lose his credibility despite all his previous good and glorious exploitsis just one little sin, all it takes for you and I to get rejected, condemned and abandoned despite previous successes and achievements is just one disappointing act. We hate to see anyone do well, achieve greatness or popularity. Our envy, strifeand jealousy will always keep us searching for one negative thing to blow out of proportion and point the world’s attention to. We disdain good effort and uphold mistakes and flaws. We derive pleasure in spreading sad stories and bad news; we exaggerate negative occurrences and make mountains out of mole hills. Even as you drive along the road if you drive a nice car, commercial vehicle drivers, conductors and commercial motorcyclists look at you with so much hate, they block you, harass you and curse at you, always quick to say ‘is it because you drive a big car, Mr rich man?’. They are quick to insinuate you’re the reason why they are poor and struggling. They believe the rich aretheir enemies. Everyone is in bitter competition and rivalry. There’s tension all around, your helpers and supporters suddenly become cruel and distant once your situation gets better. Family and friends are waiting to see any gesture or behaviour they can interpret as arrogance and pride sequel to any success you record. Spiritual leaders areexploiting religious people; politicians are exploiting the electorate, employers are exploiting employees, even many parents are blackmailing and exploiting their own children. A nation full of hate, is a nation unwilling to go far. Dear friend, look at me different as from today, please see the good in me, help me, support me, forgive me, celebrate me, encourage me and motivate me to do better and go higher. In life what you give is what you get, what you sow is what you reap, let the good start from you, let the love spreadfrom you. Please see the good in me and help me out of my bad, I want to fulfill purpose and accomplish my goals irrespective ofmy flaws. I believe in love, I need love, and so do you. Enjoy your day!
Posted on: Wed, 04 Sep 2013 15:32:04 +0000