I loved my parents. I showed them that. I listened to their words whether they were comfortable or not, respected their wisdom, whether I agreed or not, and strove to do as they requested of me in every way I could, including being obedient to them, and asked for their forgiveness when I wasnt. I did not find fault in my parents, already knowing that they did their best. I saw the good in them. I honored them. Bought them presents on high days, birthdays and when there was no reason other than doing so. I never raised my hand to my parents, never threatened either of them. And when I made mistakes, I chose to allow myself to be chastened by them. When they got old, I stood by them, until their end. I wash, cooked, cleaned and sat with my mother when she was sick, and did her errands, when I was running hard, and became distant, my mother did not fail to call me into question, and instruct me on the duties of her only son to his mother... and I stood by her until she died, even up to that day. My father was in good care, and it allowed me to move around, but we talked constantly, and of course when we didnt. He was not too proud to let me know that he missed me. I remembered his requests, and his advice as a man. He assured me that I would have many problems, but that I could overcome them. Some things I had to overcome alone, others I had my parents help. When I think of my parents, I hold those thoughts in reverence of them. My parents often told me that they loved me, and when they were not telling me, they were showing me that they did. Believe me, when they showed me, it often did not feel good, and sometimes it was downright painful. Love shows itself in many ways. But their love established me, and made me a real man, in my own eyes, if not in the eyes of others. And I think that before a man can be a man in the eyes of others, he must come to grips with himself and his inner man to the point that he can overcome his own inner fight. I am no longer double-minded. I can give love as well as take it. My days are no longer tumultuous and archaic. I have direction, purpose and know how to treat others (the way I would like to be treated) and not the way Im treated necessarily. Having my parents love, taught me to know when someone liked me and when they didnt regardless of their facial expression, their words, even their actions. I know when they dont care about me, right off the bat. I now know what envy and jealousy are, and how people will use you to get what they want while hating you all the while, thinking that somehow you wont know. They think that they can simply disregard you, treat you like a old wet mop, and God will still bless them. It aint gonna happen. I see people, watch them. I see myself as i look outward at me too, noticing how I treat others. God, I wish some of them would treat me half as well as I treat them. But they cannot. They think being responsible, treating you nicely is weakness. Dont you hear them all the time barking and biting? Well, meekness and respect are very powerful attributes, powerful tools. Most people cant believe that, so they threaten, holler, scream, fuss and fight, thinking that they have shown mature traits. Not. Just the opposite. I learned these things about myself, and have become a better person as a result. And most of all, I discovered that the people who want to be friends with you are the ones who want something from you. If you have little to offer, or something other than what theyre shopping for, then they ignore you, disregard you completely. They might give you a chance to speak to them if they discover that they need something that you have, something that they can exploit; otherwise you wont get the time of day. They will treat a total stranger who hates them better than they will you. Thats why Im happy that one of the best attributes that my parents instilled in me, was the ability to forgive people. Now, I said, forgive them... NOT tell them that I forgive them, as some will do sanctimoniously, and kick you in the butt with a, God blesshu! It all started with my parents, and it will all end with them. I have honored my father and my mother, and Ive aged well, in spite of myself and skirted many a mishap. I know at least one of my children will likely read this, and a lot of other folks children will for sure! And now, in my totally imperfect, often comically insufficient life, I find solace in the fact that if nothing else ever makes me happy; I know that my relationship with my parents will keep a smile on my face when many others do all that they can to take it off, while they pretend to be my friends. I say to them, Well done! Because there is only ONE person whom Ive wanted to be on my side forever, through all the problems and afflictions: God. Oh, I know He doesnt exist to many people. But thats okay. Even being non-existent in their minds, He is still more real than they are. Im not mad at em. I have many dreams, many things I would like to do, and no, most of them dont seem to be happening, or havent happened yet. But I know that a day can change everything. So I watch and i wait, and I wok toward an end. Patient because of parents love. + ld/
Posted on: Fri, 29 Nov 2013 08:27:42 +0000