I was given a daily devotional by my in-laws before Charlie was born. Truthfully as much as I trusted God and truly looked to him for strength and guidance during our journey with Charlie, I had a hard time opening the book. I wanted to think that I didnt need anymore religion. The same way I didnt want someone to tell me what they read on the Internet about Charlies condition, I didnt want someone to tell me about what they read in the bible. Obviously I am far from perfect and find myself wrong many times. I do need to open my heart to every reading and trust in God fully, including why something like a devotional was given to me. So letting go of my stubbornness I opened the book. As I was reading todays devotional God told me to look at July 7th, the day of Charlies surgery. The devotional says, Trust me in all your thoughts. It goes on and talks about controlling your thoughts and how to reject negative thoughts. It then says, dont try to hide them from Me; confess them and leave them with Me. Go on your way lightheartedly. This method of controlling your thoughts will keep your mind in My Presence and your feet on the path of peace. What most of you dont know is the few days leading up to Charlies surgery I was broken, I was so scared and found myself thinking the worst. The thoughts of loosing Charlie took control of everything I did. Andrew would find me crying in the shower, while I ate, or even just sitting I would just break down. To think if I would have just opened this book I might have found some peace. So tonight while I am scared and thinking about Charlies next surgery I find solace in Gods words. Trusting the path that he has lead me on has come easy, but finding peace while on the path has been quite difficult. Open your heart to The Lord and his word, he will continue to lead you on the path but also help you while you walk it!
Posted on: Tue, 12 Aug 2014 07:23:48 +0000
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