I was summoned some time ago to District Court on a minor speeding charge 7 to 10 Km over the posted limit. I pleaded NOT Guilty and elected to go to Court. The Magistrate, who may or may not have been aware that I am actually an old age pensioner, a retired Radio and TV Station Chief Engineer, (a Media person) and nowadays, a mature age online Law student made the biggest mistake of his career, when he asked me Mr Buzzard, -- WHY are you contesting this PIDDLING little matter. I replied. Your Highness, I am doing so for TWO very good reasons. ONE -- because I CAN ---- and TWO because its about bloody time that somebody actually DID. I think he realised far TOO LATE, the mistake that he had made. He gave me a look that clearly said You ARROGANT Old Bastard ! but it was far too late now -- ( for him ). I had , as is my practice, arrived in court EARLY to ensure that I got a prime seat IN the courtroom and not outside, where the latecomers and witnesses must wait. Quite apart from missing out on the amusement factor of listening to all sorts of DESPERATES attempting to argue their cases ( most of which I could have got them off in 5 minutes ) it gives one the opportunity to STUDY the Modus Operandi of the opposition, without THEM having ANY IDEA of what I plan to do to them. Lawyers DO well know the personal dispositions of most of the people that they will deal with daily in courtrooms and quite sensibly plan clients defense around certain anticipated expectations of behaviour. You as a transient are deprived of the opportunity to make a VALUE judgement of this nature, but CAN still compensate, simply by being observant. Dont sweat or fuss about the delay for YOUR case to come up, STUDY your opponents, watch their operation and style, suss out their strengths and WEAKNESSES. Look for a repetitive pattern of behaviour and above all, plan YOUR defensive campaign around your observations of their weaknesses or uncertainties. When MY turn eventually came, I stood up and told the TWO Police Prosecutors that I wanted to discuss ADRs ( Australian Design Rules) pertaining to motor vehicles. Both Police Officers complained ( Whinged actually ) to the Magistrate that THEY -- knew nothing whatsoever about ADRs -- didnt even know what they were. The Magistrate HAD to agree with me that THAT, was tough shit -- for the Police. The matter WAS -- at THAT point --- to proceed. I then turned my attention to the Magistrate ( as the Police were NOT pursuing the case anymore) and used HIS own mention of this being a PIDDLING little case, to make a Laughing Stock out of HIM ! I am not bad as a Public speaker and NOT afraid of Courtrooms. They ARE set up in such a manner as to intimidate and disadvantage YOU-- the Defendant. It DOSENT HAVE to work every time. Make sure that it does not. There are many ways to DISRESPECT a Magistrate, without being overtly obvious about it. Each time that you must address Him/Her, - address them by a DIFFERENT title. Your Majesty, -- Your Excellence -- Your Reverence - Your Highness -- Your Whatever. It makes a rather subtle MOCKERY of their OWN perceived importance of position and is NOT lost on the public gallery, who will laugh. Nevertheless, there is absolutely NOTHING whatsoever that the Magistrate can do to you in the Contempt of Court area, -- for simply forgetting his title. I kept right on plugging the --- Piddling little case --- phrase and without much trouble at all, made a complete Bloody FOOL of the man. The Public gallery were LAUGHING at HIM. I had succeeded in turning HIS courtroom in to a CIRCUS and HE -- had lost control of it. Why is there always an opportunity to do this ? --- because Magistrates are in essence, - Egotistical souls, who largely believe that THEY can Ridicule and belittle Defendants with Impunity. Its NICE -- to see them get THEIR Come - Uppance, now and again and just when they DONT expect it. As for Police Prosecutors - they HAVE to be supremely confident of a WIN under almost ANY defense tactic. It is NOT difficult to BREAK that cycle by hitting them with the unexpected. This entire process is designed to run to a predetermined formula. Low level speeding -- $75.00 fine -- No points loss in WA. Just like shooting fish in a barrel. Oh Christ how the money rolls in - Rolls in - Oh Christ how the money rolls in. Cost far too much for the average person to contest -- so MOST just pay. In MOST instances, there is NO OFFENSE actually committed at all. But what a Sweet little Racket for the State Govt. and the Police Eh ? The Magistrate had NO OPTION but to dismiss the case and TRY to salvage his DIGNITY. Despite SIX More low speed infringements, to which I have pleaded NOT GUILTY, - I have never succeeded in getting into Court again. WA Police ALWAYS send me - about ONE Month prior to the listed Court hearing, the SAME 3 line letter informing me that at a meeting Prior to prosecution, and upon further reflection -- the decision has been made by WA Police, to WITHDRAW the complaint. Bugger Eh ? These people FAIL to realise just how entertaining it can be for an Old boy like me to contest such matters and also how it advances my Legal studies as well.
Posted on: Wed, 03 Sep 2014 17:15:46 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015