I was thinking about all the awful times he has made an effort to get me confused or upset. At first he made me feel so loved and he said he wanted me to be his only girl. He called me sweets eventually. After the first two weeks when we met, my mothers hand slipped from a cloth that was on her dresser. A heavy jewelry box fell on her head and she laid on the floor over night. She couldnt get up or call me. I found out the following day and ran over there. I took her to urgent care. She was fine and when we got home, I decided to stay with her for a few days. I kept in touch with ( the now ex boyfriend ) him by phone. A few months after this incident, he says to me. I bet you didnt know while you were gone at your mothers , I had the chance to find someone else. He had said this to me twice. This disturbed me as I thought seriously? you would think about finding someone else when you knew that my mother was injured and I was there to help her? Well, eventually he kept talking to me on the phone and I dismissed it and thought maybe I misunderstood him but now I know it was a part of many games that he played with my head. Then the jealousy games began and he even found another stroke survivor to get close to a few months into our relationship. From what I have learned about sociopaths and narcs, they love to get you feeling like your competing ( in my case with other women ) and now I know that is exactly what he was doing to me. It got to a point where this other women and I were on bad terms with each other. Now I understand what this all boils down to. It was his thrill, his cruelty to make me and the other lady feel bad. He admitted awhile back that he loved to go into Craigslist message board and trigger people to get angry. This should of been a red flag for me. He walked away from our relationship, dusted himself off and is looking like hes the greatest gift on earth. After all he is a Stroke survivor Administrator for several groups. And I just lost a lot of stroke survivor friends only because I was so upset on how he treated me all those months and the fact that I wanted to let people know who he really is. He told me he was accused of rape from his neighbor but he was finally proven innocent a year later and the month I met him, now Im not so sure he really is so innocent. This girl took her life a month ago. It sickens me to think how he made himself to look like he loved me by posting nice things on my wall but yet on the phone he would try and get me jealous with his strange conversations about who he called georgous women. It was a constant subject to talk about. I just cant wait for the day that I am free to not even think about this or remember it all. Going to seek counseling to find out more about narcissist relationships and how this has affected me. And most importantly, how I will become strong again.
Posted on: Wed, 07 Jan 2015 17:28:53 +0000
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