I work late at night cuz my shows all go late, I stay up all night because of the adrenaline from the shows takes me forever to wind down. I sometimes get up early cuz of meetings, dance instructing dayjob, classes etc-- when I am not performing or rehearsing in the early evenings I try to lay low and go to bed somewhat earlier. I also love to sleep when I can and stay home & chill by myself. I love being alone, its my therapy. Believe it or not, I am a very introverted homebody. I have made it a life rule to never check facebook until I get home- I hate those ppl who just stare at their screens in public places so I made a rule to save social media for home. When I rehearse, which is hours at a time, I put my phone in a locker or a cubby - lol I cant text when I am dancing or singing. I run around and hustle all the time-- I am on the go a lot always trying to figure out my next gig. This is my life - I am a gypsy. I dont get a salary or a set in stone work schedule. I dont work for a corporate company or sit in an office from 9-5 hoping desperately for my paid vacation hours to set in, or when can I go to the bar to meet my friends every night once my shift is over. Showbiz is all over the place- as am I! but its an honest living and I chose my art over being unhappy in a thankless life with no passion. But with this comes time delays & issues with seeing my family and friends who mean the world to me but it is very rough. I barely get to see my mother or my best friend Lauren - and often times it does take me 2-3 days to get back to someone. Thats just how it is. It does make me feel guilty and sad and I hate to hurt anyones feelings or make them upset but really It has nothing to do with me not caring, or avoiding u, or being a bad friend. I am not selfish, or an asshole. It doesnt mean I am not there for u either, whether u are up or down I will always love my friends. But just because we care about each other doesnt mean we are endetted to each other. Friends should never have emotional debt- its an unfair expectation and its dysfunctional. I dont understand why some people take it so personal. If I text someone that I love- a family member or friend, and it takes them a couple days to get back to me- that is completely understandable & chill and I dont sweat it at all- I know that they dont HATE me, its just how it is and i respect that. Please understand that Cest la vie. Love you guys.
Posted on: Sun, 10 Aug 2014 21:29:47 +0000
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