Im going to double down on my controversial post from earlier today. Heres why.... I got to enjoy quiet, simple dinner with my husband tonight - a very rare occurrence for us - and we talked our day, we smiled at each other, we made jokes about stuff, we looked into each others eyes. With one kid in the tub singing to his rubber ducks and the other kid upstairs reading, it was just the two of us and it was lovely. We talked about the threads from earlier today where our group dissected the concept of parents overusing their phones and devices to the detriment of their children. The physical and emotional risks were researched, weighed, and discussed....and then argued against or rationalized away. For me it isnt all that important whether people agreed or disagreed with the article I shared (that most didnt even read), I had just hoped a few more people would have understood the intent of it -- we need to plug back in to our people. Our littlest people need it the most, the plugging back in. And we need to make that investment now so they still see us as people worth coming to when they become less little and their problems and triumphs become bigger than the leap or monkey bar crossing were watching for the zillionth time. Or not watching. I get it. We are busy people, we need to squeeze in an email here and a text there. We need these three minutes while the kids are on the playground to decompress and read the news or look at someones chubby baby or cute pet in our newsfeed. We need Pinterest. We need something just for our selves that isnt doing a single freaking thing for anyone else. I get it. Parenthood can be dull and is repetitive. But I think there is a reason for the repetition - it is so short, those years when they are begging for our attention. The repetition is to sear into our brains what those tiny voices sounded like, what those tiny hands felt like, what those wildly swinging legs looked like the first time that victorious monkey bar crossing happened and your kid turned to you with a smile like a jack-o-lantern and then caught your gaze before they leaped off the ladder and fist pumped the air. Thats the big stuff. It is great. But the seventy thousandth monkey bar crossing is also important, it is the mastery now that counts. The look-how-big-I-am-now strut that comes at the end. The jazz hands you just missed. We miss too much. Sure, you are there for the big stuff. And that counts. But childhood isnt about the big stuff. It is about all the millions of little stuff in between those big moments. Im not sharing ANY of this because Im judging you. Or trying to guilt you. Im sharing all of it because Im celebrating with you. Im celebrating how great all of this is, when were tuned in and present and see our people in these moments as a gift. Not every moment, but most moments. Some of it even sucks, actually. And we should still show up for that. Im wanting you to see those little, I-have-something-better-to-do-moments as the ones that add up to count. They are the good stuff. So just dont miss it. Look up. https://youtube/watch?v=Z7dLU6fk9QY
Posted on: Wed, 19 Nov 2014 03:29:00 +0000
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