Its like I wuz lost but God found me; All tha praying I did and kept Faith thru it all got me Blessed with a job, got me out tha Court System, my son, my studio, my house, my car...but apparently I got lost again in tha Blessings that were pouring down upon me and lost sight of where they were comin from. SMH Tha Truth iz: I feel like I felt like God owed me these Blessings for all tha Hell He put me thru but na I know that it wuz I whom put myself in those situations bringing all tha Hell upon myself. It wuz my own hand that caused my pain and suffering. Yes I grew up BELEW tha Poverty Line; came to tha Burg with nothin but tha shirts on our backs. My Mother wuz a Tupperware manager and made extremely good money in Alton but in fear of her and her childrens lives, we fled here where my Mothers side of tha family wuz...welllll it turns out, most of our own blood could care less what happened to us so we stayed in homeless shelters for about a year till Mamma found a job...we moved to tha Hood...tha PJs back when pigs wouldnt even grunt round there. I wuz 6 in tha Projects...I wuz in Kindergarten goin ta first. I got jumped EVERY day just about because I wuz tha only cracka in that circle. When you get jumped errday you learn ta fight back with vengeance. Youon see me racist do you? Tha Struggle...we wuz fa Real caught up in it and its still goin strong taday. I mean watchu realllllly know bout havin ta take cold showers in tha winter heating up water over fires in your backyard just ta get hot water for those cup roman noodles you eat errday...kerosen lamps as light...no electricity. You younguns nadayz talk about tha Struggle cuz you aint got no cable or ya phone iz outta minutes...MOST of tha people talking about struggling to make it, are prolly just sayin it so folks will relate to them. Im just sayin main, thru all these years up till right now, Ive been thru alot shit like I wuz walkin behind a horse and I am still breathing to this day ta talk about it? Im Blessed. That video I shared wala go...dude explained it perfectly. I am backslidin like a mug but yet I know what Im doin when I sin...I am a backslidin hypocrite whose demons are many and I am completely ashamed to admit that. :( ~Random
Posted on: Tue, 29 Jul 2014 10:01:23 +0000