Ive been told to post this in here. Now Im a proud Ellesmere Port man. So dont think for one minute Im being sniffy. Im not. I love the Port. Hopefully it will amuse a few of you. The Post Office is a repository for many essential services and products. But it also stocks the most ridiculous chintz and ephemera. Flying toy helicopters, gift cards for days I never knew exsisted, and the wonderous, My first make-up, I want to look like Mummy, set, sold for the incredibly cheap price of £16.99. I never knew there was a Best Friends Day, or a Step Parent Day, and for that matter, so far Ive been blissfully unaware that cards could be bought congratulating you on your divorce, with the rather splendid message inside, Beautiful men are few and far between, but they are out there, congratulations on your decree absolute. It is also a place where you can go to feel much better about yourself. A snippet of what Ive just overheard. Who the hell does Tracey think she is ? I know, what a slut, bags a new man and she thinks shes Lady muck. I was round there yesterday and she has fruit on the side. No one is even ill. What a show off. Same for me, I went for a coffee and she gave me this filter stuff made in one of those beaker type things. Wasnt even Nescafe. Cafetiere ? No this was like a beaker thing that she pushed down. So a cafetiere, thats what they are called. Fvcking hell, your worse than she is. And you know what else she had ? A half eaten Battenberg. Who leaves half a Battenberg ? Fvcking posh slut. Shell be buying Vienettas soon. Ellesmere Port can be a lot of fun if you scratch off the surface and look a little closer.
Posted on: Thu, 24 Jul 2014 13:45:49 +0000