Jealousy. It is not a sign of caring or love. It is a sign of insecurity and the need to control. Jealousy has no place in a relationship....period. Jealousy is the #1 reason relationships fail. If you do not trust your partner, the relationship is toxic. You either need to examine why you are insecure and discuss it openly with your partner, or you need to break off the relationship....because it will end-sooner or later. Do NOT try to control your partner. Each of you have friends which the other may or may not like, regardless of that, these are friends of your partner and you must accept that. You cannot tell your partner to break-off relationships with friends (male or female) just because you are insecure. You and your partner do not need to be together 24-7. Each of you need your own time to do things that interest you, to be with your friends, to have alone time or as I call it me time. Think I dont know what Im talking about?? Well, come this January 20th, Dean & I will celebrate year #26. Just over 23 years ago, just shortly after we found out I was pregnant, I started getting phone calls from a woman named Rachel wanting to talk to Dean. She would call during the day when Dean was at work. At one point, after I told her he was not home, she said... Well, tell him I had fun last night and hung up. Hmmm....after dinner that night, I asked him if he knew someone named Rachel, which he didnt, so I proceeded to tell him about the phone calls. I never once doubted him. After our conversation, I told him, that if we had a girl, I wanted to name her Rachel...of, course, the baby was a boy and we named him Dorian. We both have friends that the other doesnt like, we simply agree not to bring those people to the house or to events where we are together, but we havent broken off the friendships. We dont get bent out of shape when a hug is given to an old friend or school mate. Anyway, if I had let jealousy or insecurity rule my thoughts, that could have been the end of what is a beautiful 26 year relationship. I believe in true love and there is no room for jealousy. Its okay if you or your partner see someone else as attractive, thats normal. There will always be someone out there who is prettier, more muscular, skinnier, with a head full of hair, with no wrinkles, etc., accept that and move on. All successful relationships are based on mutual respect and trust, compromise and faith. Marriage is meant to be FOREVER. It is not a trial or something that is always fun. It is hard work that reaps the best benefits...Everlasting Love... Why am I writing this???? Im writing this because Im tired of seeing young people failing at relationships because of jealousy. The son of one of my friends just ended a 4 year relationship because of jealousy. He is heartbroken because he thought he would marry this young lady. But instead, he felt controlled and suffocated and was being accused of things that were without merit and only the twisted thoughts of a jealous woman. Im relieved that he was strong enough to walk away, but my heart hurts for him. This is just extremely sad to me. Hopefully this will help others see the devastation jealousy brings to a relationship, and possibly save a relationship...that could one day be a real life Happily Ever After.....
Posted on: Sat, 10 Jan 2015 23:14:14 +0000
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