July 31, 1993 Joe was a month away from turning 23....and I was a day away from turning 22. He was 120 lbs and wore a boys size 16 (giggle...oh it was fun standing with all the moms outside the dressing room! Honey, is there enough room? Right here? In the crotch area....??? ROFL!!). I was 130 lbs and a size eight...and, of course, felt fat SHEESH. I wore my sister Willas wedding dress which had to be altered like crazy for my chest and I couldnt breathe so well....I overheard his mom say She had to diet like crazy to wear that dress (seeing.red) My hair was long...his was, too ;-) (a mullet! PERMED!) I was a semester away from graduating with my B.A. in Communication (minors in English and theater) from SOSU, Durant, OK. I had been attending summer classes and only had a week or so before fall semester started. Joe was working at a grocery store (when I graduated and got my first teaching job, he went back to school and finished his degree in History. We didnt have Josiah until we had been married five years). Donna Huggins, Nancy Gentry, Sherri Dixon and Jacque Hocking hosted my wedding shower. Our entire social circle was wrapped up in our church which was having their big revival week the week before the wedding so we couldnt be married in our church, Victory Life. We instead were married in the church where Joe had been youth pastor....and was ordained as a minister (yes. really): Crossroads Baptist in Mead, OK. The ceremony was July 31, 1993 at 7 p.m. My friends from Tarkio college traveled from out-of state to be with me: David-Michael-Allen, Charlene McCormack, and Jeff Owens. I felt so loved when Charlene helped me get ready for the ceremony and calmed my nerves. The associate pastor from our church...our dear friend...and the man who counseled us before marriage--Lee Armstrong--performed our wedding ceremony.Cindy Groce played the piano. Ginger Armstrong did sign language. Paula Stout was our photographer. There was some family drama/conflict and my original plan of all three sisters as bridesmaids/matrons didnt happen....but Willa was my Matron of Honor and Jacque and Elizabeth Hocking stood next to her. Elizabeth also danced for the ceremony. Jacque sang...as did her daughter, Bethany. Ron sang I will be there. Joes little brother, Jon, was the best man and Eric Dennis (pastor of Crossroads) was the groomsman. Candle lighters were Chuck Hanks, Ronnie Rogers, Clay Emerick and Jason Serner. Gerald Wilcox was the usher. Mikaya Hocking and Kianne Weis were the little girls who passed out rice packets! We served communion during our service....and had ballet....and a worship service. Yes...I was odd even then (but in a different way). We had cheesecake for the reception ;-). Myra Kerby caught the bouquet. Duane Crumbacher caught the garter. Joe was an introvert pretending to be an extrovert. I was a young performer overly conscious of how things looked. We were both pretty miserable through the wedding ceremony! Each anniversary we talked about how little we knew each other then...how uncomfortable we both were. The first three years of marriage truly were hellish! We fought like cats and dogs! We came from different backgrounds....we saw things from totally different perspectives....and we were KIDS! ;-) But we were determined and committed and over the course of 18 1/2 years....we meshed. We learned to accept our differences....revel in them, even. I found his goal for life....to raise a family out in the country...was a good goal. I helped him achieve it and he enjoyed it for five years...and now my children and I continue to live the dream. I am eternally grateful that I had so many years with Joseph J. Jackson. He was a brilliant, intuitive, insightful and generous man. He didnt always say the right things...but he DID the right things (and that makes a world of difference!). He had a strong sense of personal duty and integrity and character. He was a most attentive father. And he loved me...oh...he loved me. No doubts.
Posted on: Thu, 31 Jul 2014 13:39:23 +0000
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