Just wanted to let all of my family and friends know I am thankful for their care, concern and prayers. I thought I was starting the new chemo today but the oncologist just wanted me to be fully aware or the difficulties I would be experiencing if I decided to go ahead with the treatment. She also told me that I would just be prolonging my life for what could only be a short period of time. She said due to the challenges I have had with the previous chemo the situation would only worsen and I needed to think what quality of life I wanted to have over the next short period of time. I was dumfounded and at first was adamant that I wanted to go ahead. She went through different courses of action I could take but there were drawbacks due to my different health challenges. She said it was my choice and when we left I told her I wanted to go ahead. My dream was to go back to UK next Summer to visit with my family but either way from what she said that does not look like it will be possible. Subsequently I am beginning to have doubts. If I could arrange health cover for myself while we were there and we decide for me not to have the chemo we might go over to England this Summer. If this is possible and we do get the cover we might arrange for me to have another opinion at The Cancer Hospital,The Royal Marsden, that treated me while we were on our Mission in 2010. Before my appointment with the oncologist I was given the most wonderful Priesthood Blessing. In the blessing I was told that I had to listen carefully to what my oncologist would be saying to me and to remember that they know from experience and much training what is best for me. I was told that Father in heaven has my days numbered and He is the one who will determine when my time to come home will be. There was many other things told to me in the blessing one of which was that I would have peace and I would know without any doubt that the Lord is in charge and he is watching over me. I did not intend to write all of this tonight in fact after I got home from the clinic I was so gutted I could hardly speak without breaking down. The chemo has been ordered and I should be having it next Wednesday, but by Monday I have to make a prayerful decision as to what course I am going to take. I posted my last message a few days ago on facebook which was easy to do but it took me nearly a full day to copy and paste it onto my yahoo account and send it out to many of my friends and family that do not use facebook. The way I am feeling at the moment it would be hard for me to do that again so if any of you dear friends are in e-mail contact with anyone that you think might want to read this could you please pass this on to them for me.
Posted on: Fri, 28 Jun 2013 05:27:04 +0000
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