Merkel’s shitstorm in Goethe’s language German is an extraordinarily versatile language, famed particularly for its Bandwurmwörter, or “tapeworm words”. Whereas the English speaker, for example, must refer to vehicle liability insurance, the German can speak of Kraftfahrzeughaftpflichtversicherung without even pausing for breath. Yet even German has its limits. According to the latest edition of Duden, the pre-eminent Teutonic dictionary, an English word for a particularly noxious public outcry — and which sounds like a weather event in a latrine — has passed into recognised vernacular in what was once the tongue of Goethe. Despite being too rude to be printed on this page, it has been used by Angela Merkel herself. How remarkable that German feels so bereft of rude words that it must import ours. When Mrs Merkel exits a building, after all, she does so through the Ausfahrt. Should she wear jewellery, she will be donning Schmuck. If lunch is a cracker, or Knäckebrot, it may even taste of Knob- lauch, or garlic. Afterwards, she may wish to consult an Arzt (doctor) about the health service, or summon a Botschafter (ambassador) to the Rathaus (town hall). And all without sniggering. This, indeed, is about as tame as German gets. No wonder Mrs Merkel prefers to dress in plain clothes; the adjective for “multicoloured” could not be written in a family newspaper. Nor could many place names, most of them in Bavaria. The mountain pronounced (but of course not spelt) as “Vank” sounds like a particularly lonely place. Of a certain pale ale (or Hell) brewed in a particular town in Austria that starts with an “F”, we have no comment to make. And yet, with all this swirling around, Germany has decided that, in order to express itself with suitable force, English swear words are required. And they say these people have no sense of humour. I wished I did write this piece of prose.
Posted on: Thu, 04 Jul 2013 12:56:18 +0000
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