My New Year Resolutions for 2015 are: For Iggy Izalea to stop whats shes doing. And for Taylor Swift to keep doing what shes doing. For the Patriots to win their 4th Super Bowl. For Kim Kardashian to find something better to wipe her bum so it doesnt have to look like a glazed donut. And for everybody to limit the use of their phone in public so we can be more likely to engage in a discussion that serendipitously arrives at interesting topics. Like, I dont know, for instance a topic like, how Jimmy Carter was a much better President than Ronald Reagan. Or how Waldo Heraldo Faldo was a more enjoyable awkward friend in Family Matters than Kimmy Gibler was in Full House. Or that Kurt Warner was a better QB than Brett Favre. Who the best characters are in The Wire. Or that it is somehow possible that the movie Pootie Tang could be viewed as a revolutionary form of artwork by people 250 years into the future. And that Pedro Martinez was the most dominant baseball player ever if you isolate the 3 best years of every player. Think about what Rocky Balboa said to the Soviet Union in 85, If I can change, and you can change, THEM EVRYBUBBY CAN CHANGE! Happy New Year everybody!
Posted on: Thu, 01 Jan 2015 13:29:50 +0000
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