My mother passed away last Sunday. It was a very long and painful 10 years of her life. Im so grateful for the days I spent with her for those 10 years. Eventually she forgot who I was but that never stopped me from loving her and letting her know that I did! Her disease took away who she was but thank goodness she had 12 children and a great husband who did remember! Below is what I presented at her eulogy. My dad wrote it during her illness. Its an incredible reminder to caregivers that the time you spend and pain you suffer each day is not being wasted. I hope it is of comfort to any of you who may be presently suffering through this tough time in your life...and those of you who already have. It Must Be Love Norma is saying to me in the middle of our dinnertime, Where is everyone. I look up startled and after a pause I answer as I have many times before, we are all alone in the house this evening. This same question is repeated again and I have learned to answer it as if given to me for the first time. I have always enjoyed Normas company at suppertime and I was lost in a time lapse of what would have been normal activity in our past relationship. It seemed at the moment, of just sharing meal together time, as we had done in our normal everyday life style of the past. Before being pulled back to reality, I drift back in memories to the many years she served the family so well. I have been able to keep a positive attitude in my caregiving efforts, which appears to have convinced Norma of her feeling secure in my caregiving for her. This responsibility however has made me aware of my lack of the skills required for her care. I have read as much professional literature as I can find, to give Norma the best care that I am capable. With this information, I find myself more secure, when I make caregiving decisions for her. It is a heart-rendering venture I have accepted, but with the additional knowledge I find it easier to get through the trying days that inevitably come. Yes things are getting done, and I find I have more confidence with the help given me in caregiving instruction guides. I have found that it is love that gives me the drive to learn more of how to do the job I seem not to be qualified for. I am finding the truth; that love is a given not a purchase, nor is it forced upon, or coerced. With this attitude I work to keep Normas confidence, which seems to free her from some of the confusion in what is happening to her. I can only imagine the mixed emotions taking place in her loss, to express her thoughts. I have pledged my caregiving to the person I have pledged my love. Attitude gives me a head start as a successful caregiver and it is also a pick-me-up when the road gets bumpy. There is no greater rejuvenation than the memories of relationship. Self sacrifice, and conquered fears will overcome the crosses that are given to us in the daily live or let live situations. There are occurrences that will inevitably be given to me, but they can be countered by reaching into the reserves of our good time memories. Faith, Hope and Charity; these are the pedestals and foundation that my future caregiver success will be built on. Every day I work for the Faith of a brighter day, a hope in the future of cure, and of course Charity is strength along with perseverance. Like
Posted on: Mon, 29 Sep 2014 16:20:33 +0000