Not feeling very funny today. Besides being sick, I cant stop thinking about Keith and Derek. 13 years is not enough time to spend with someone you love. Its so unfair and I cant help but think what if this were John and I? How would either of us even cope? What do you do when your support system is ripped out from under you? Facing this world alone can be daunting, especially when you planned a lifetime with someone else. Friends are great and they can fill in some of the gaping hole, but they arent there to hold you late at night or to whisper how much they love you while you cook dinner in the kitchen. They arent there in the morning to fight over who left the toilet seat up or to try to blame that smell on the dogs. They dont drink the last of the milk and put the container back in the fridge. They dont call you up and beg you to bring them their wallet they left at home on the way to work or send a text of grocery items needed. They arent the ones to wipe away your tears when you are sad and tell you everything is going to be ok and somehow by that simple gesture it really is better. They dont text you 6 or 7 times a day just to say they love you. Its all the little things in life the silly moments, the sweet and aggravating things that as a couple you experience and cherish and somehow through all of it they make your life feel complete. So yes, I do wonder how and why these things happen and how you pick up those pieces. Where you know from that moment on, your life will never be the same. I have many of you on my friends list that I know personally that have been through this. Its devastating to lose anyone you care about but a spouse or child must be the toughest and cruelest thing to have to rise back from. Maybe its because they both represent hope. Hope for the future and hope for a better life, a better world. When you lose that..well you lose everything. For those of us that do still have the opportunity to tell our loved ones, our spouses, our children how much they are loved, we should never waste the opportunity to share with them how important, meaningful, and significant they are to us. Savor every moment that you can. Because tomorrow is not promised for any of us and you never want to look back and say I wish I had...So now I go back to my routine. The stupid little day to day things that distract us from what is really important in life will eventually get in the way again, until something like this smacks us in the face to remind us of what is really important and what life is really about. For me, that thing is Love and the love I feel for my husband.
Posted on: Sat, 27 Dec 2014 14:22:11 +0000