Not so long ago I decided my life would be better off not married. That decision has brought me some really tough days and a lot of really tough nights. You see, I was going into my new life with a blind spot. I forgot who I was. I let my fears take the best parts of me away and hide it deep beneath the surface of a once very courageous woman, ready to take on the world, and I did. I opened my own business and was extremely successful. I had money and nice things, but something was strikingly missing. Every day, day in and day out, I put on a smile and pushed forward, not knowing what I was pushing toward. Try this, sample that, breath in, breath out. Monotony. Mono tone. Bland. Lifeless. As time went on I realized I was leaving a really poor legacy behind for my kids. Did they think I was a failure? Did I make bad decisions? I sure did, but I dealt with them and tried again at something different. One thing that was very apparent was that I wasnt going to give up. That trail has lead me to a very unique moment in my 12 year olds life. Today, my baby was cut from the basketball team. I know. I know. Youre thinking awe poor baby!, but something big is just around the bend of this story. We dont do anything small in these parts. Nope. We rise up and try something else. We wont let that keep us down. Not today anyway. My kids look up to me when it comes to sports. They know how serious I took the game of basketball and how much I loved to play. She told me that she will just keep trying out year after year until she makes the team. Thats the spirit I thought. She asked me if I thought she failed today. A lump rose up in my throat as I choked back tears and said to her the only failure today would have been if you didnt even try out. Im proud of you for being courageous enough to take a chance. That moment was a win for us. We know that money and big houses and fancy cars isnt what makes us rich or popular, its the moments in our lives that define our strength and our character beyond any pile of money. Ive worked hard. Ive been so high on life that the ground seemed like a speck of dust beneath me and Ive been so low that life seemed barely worth waking to. Ive made some rare good decisions and a lot of really bad ones, but the best decision I ever made was to stick with the parent thing and do my best to show my kids I wont give up, not even on them. When things seem bleak and theres no positive ending in site, I find a new way, an even better way than before. Is that failing? No, thats reinventing our life for the better. Life is about chances. Some of the best moments in my life resulted in being courageous enough to live them. Im no supermodel and I dont own a Fendi purse, but Im rich beyond my wildest dreams when it comes to the things that money cannot buy. Waking up to that notion is a relief. I feel sorry for those that have not realized the value of the things they cannot buy or the things that are priceless. Missing those parts of ones life is tragic. Go out there and live without fear of losing, but with excitement of what lies ahead all because you took a chance on something you feared the most.
Posted on: Fri, 12 Sep 2014 00:31:14 +0000
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