On this day in 1973, March 25, known to Catholics and many other Christians as the Feast of the Annunciation, my family lost my grandmother, then 70 years of age. Born in Evanston on December 8, 1902 into a large Irish family, she was named Mary Hayes. In those days, if you were Catholic, especially an Irish Catholic, and your daughter was born on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, there was no question as to what youd name her! Both born and died on two of the major Marian feast days; thats gotta mean something! She was a model in the 1920s and 30s, and married a lawyer who wound up a prosecutor - Col. Ralph Emerson Brown, JAG - in one of the offshoots of the Nuremberg trials - known as the sub-Nurembergs - after the war. By the time I came around, Gram was something of a shut-in from the weakness that comes from decades of cigarette smoking (chiefly emphysema). A vivacious Irish gal (her parents were from County Cork, having come to Chicagoland via a decade or so in Toronto), Gram played cards, bet at the track or with convenient bookies (in the days before OTB locations), and watched the Mass for Shut-Ins on TV.... There was usually a card game going on at her apartment on Chicagos north side (Rogers Park)... a bunch of little old ladies playing poker and drinking coffee, scotch or gin. It was great. Gram taught me to play poker, rummy, blackjack and casino when I was about four. By the time I was six, she warned me against gambling. I said, But YOU gamble, Gram! She said Yes, but Im good at it; you havent got the knack! (She was right. I play poker for fun, but Im not good enough to risk going to a casino!) We lost her when I was about 10; The emphysema finally killed her at the age of 70. I never got a chance to play contract bridge with her; I didnt learn bridge til I was twelve. She said that had been her game in the 30s and 40s... Please dont ever smoke, friends. If you smoke, please stop... the damage done your lungs starts to recede the day you cease puffing that poison... Grams wake was cool... Ill never forget that wake... it was a normal Chicago Irish wake at first, everybody telling stories about the old days... and then this city bus arrived, and this group of about twenty of her friends filed out. All older ladies, from her various poker groups. Single file, pouring out of the bus, copies of the Racing Form poking out of their purses, chattering about Hawthorn and Arlington Park... It was like a scene out of a Damon Runyan story. So neat. Shed been a shut-in for most of a decade, but still had tons of friends; shed host poker nights and other gatherings. And she was a terrific grandmother to her only grandchild! (my sister Mary Di Leo Poole wasnt to come around until ten years later). R.I.P. and God Bless You, Gramma Mary! John F. Di Leo
Posted on: Tue, 25 Mar 2014 11:39:10 +0000
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