Seeing Myself For Who I Truly Am… Ever since the conference of “Coming Out of Prayer with Power” by Prophetess Natasha Oquendo . I’ve been praying for weeks even before the conference for God to show me “ME”; show me who I really am and what needs to be changed within me. Did He do it? Yes, he did and the results hurt me to the core. He showed me that I am a mean, heartless, cold, sarcastic, and ruthless individual. I hurt people that are close to me or those who at least try to get close to me and I hold everything in to the point where it only releases itself in anger and tears, no words. I tend to push people away before they even get a chance to know me, I shut down easily, and that I am consistent with being a loner to the point where it I expect people to eventually abandon me so to speak. I always come up with excuses and as strong as I may seem, my heart and soul are extremely sensitive. In finding this out about me, it’s embarrassing. I find myself to be troublesome within my spirit yet my outer person seems so strong. Fooled you didn’t I? But God has proven to me time and time again that He knows me a lot better than most individuals. But along with the bad, He’s shown me that I’m a sensitive person; I cry at the drop of hat now lol. I’m a great listener; I know how to give people space and time when needed; I’m a consistent prayer (though I need to pray MORE); I’m very independent and self-sufficient, and when I love people, I love hard. But although God has revealed and showed me that there is some good in me, I still need to remove the bad from my inner being. I know and I am prepared to be rebuked, corrected, and molded into a new being in Christ. God knows that I can withstand this process because only He knows the previous things that I’ve been through. I know that this sort of exposure and revelation is a process in its own. So please don’t judge me; God isn’t through with me yet and I know that He will keep me covered when going through the fire, nevertheless, I’m prepared and ready. Just remember when you pray to God to reveal who you truly are, be prepared. The truth may be very ugly, but know that He will rebuke and correct you only so that you may not resist Him. God WILL strengthen the good in you and remove the bad; trust and have faith in Him. My journey to being made over has only begun…… XOXO- Shan
Posted on: Fri, 20 Sep 2013 22:16:49 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015