Shamelessly stolen from a FB friend: Read and learn. And now your (second) late night post, as part of a Facebook algorithm experiment: This fans is Eeyore, the aptly named Great Pyrenees. (insert picture) In addition to having the perfect expression that captures exactly how I feel tonight about the world at large, this boy is adoptable in New England this weekend. Restore my faith in humanity and adopt him, please, so spread the word. Eeyore needs a home with people with an IQ above their shoe size. Based on my inbox tonight and some random messages sent on Facebook this evening, I fear that finding him a home with someone capable of chewing gum and walking at the same time may be exceedingly difficult, present company excluded of course. I know you all wonder at some of the imbeciles we deal with and some of you have kindly suggested that we have some sort of extraordinary patience in dealing with these people. I am going to let you all in on a secret: we mock this behind closed (email) doors. Otherwise we would have all gone insane long before now. In the past 48 hours, I have been treated to some fantastic gems of questionable wisdom leading me to quote the great Eeyore: People who dont think probably dont have brains; rather, they have grey fluff thats blown into their heads by mistake. Yes, Eeyore was a misunderstood sage. I present to you the top five stupid things said to me (or to people I work with) in the past few days for your edification and amusement: 1. My dog got herself pregnant. Uh, I suspect your stupidity coupled with that loose lab may have had a hand in this. 2. My border collie just sits and stares at me. I think shes crazy or somethin. Well, perhaps she cant believe her misfortune at being owed by a sub-hominid. Possibly, she is sizing you up to decide if she can begin the revolution. 3. How much for dick surgery for my dog? (Props to Animal House for this one). I am not sure there is a surgery they can perform which will do much to improve your sterling elocution or critical thinking skills. 4. If u wuz a legtimite rescue u wuld not charge $$$$. Well, sir, we need funds to be able to afford to take care of dogs who have higher IQs than their owners. (Side note: I weep for the state of education in the United States). 5. How dare you criticize me. I came to you because I need to get rid of a dog not get a lecture. I do so love the self-righteous who wallow unaware in their own hypocrisy to the amusement of those watching. So fans, I have been inundated with the morons and the obtuse and I pray daily for some mythical place of enlightenment, but for now, Ill just settle for finding a home for this sweet guy. Eeyore is 3 years old, 90 pounds, sweet, fluffy and full of mournful looks, but he is good with other dogs and people, possibly even the dumb ones. Interested parties should email elizabeth@bigfluffydogs. Those who know the location of that utopia of logic and reason should message me with the details where I can find such a place. And now your (second) late night post, as part of a Facebook algorithm experiment: This fans is Eeyore, the aptly named Great Pyrenees. In addition to having the perfect expression that captures exactly how I feel tonight about the world at large, this boy is adoptable in New England this weekend. Restore my faith in humanity and adopt him, please, so spread the word. Eeyore needs a home with people with an IQ above their shoe size. Based on my inbox tonight and some random messages sent on Facebook this evening, I fear that finding him a home with someone capable of chewing gum and walking at the same time may be exceedingly difficult, present company excluded of course. I know you all wonder at some of the imbeciles we deal with and some of you have kindly suggested that we have some sort of extraordinary patience in dealing with these people. I am going to let you all in on a secret: we mock this behind closed (email) doors. Otherwise we would have all gone insane long before now. In the past 48 hours, I have been treated to some fantastic gems of questionable wisdom leading me to quote the great Eeyore: People who dont think probably dont have brains; rather, they have grey fluff thats blown into their heads by mistake. Yes, Eeyore was a misunderstood sage. I present to you the top five stupid things said to me (or to people I work with) in the past few days for your edification and amusement: 1. My dog got herself pregnant. Uh, I suspect your stupidity coupled with that loose lab may have had a hand in this. 2. My border collie just sits and stares at me. I think shes crazy or somethin. Well, perhaps she cant believe her misfortune at being owed by a sub-hominid. Possibly, she is sizing you up to decide if she can begin the revolution. 3. How much for dick surgery for my dog? (Props to Animal House for this one). I am not sure there is a surgery they can perform which will do much to improve your sterling elocution or critical thinking skills. 4. If u wuz a legtimite rescue u wuld not charge $$$$. Well, sir, we need funds to be able to afford to take care of dogs who have higher IQs than their owners. (Side note: I weep for the state of education in the United States). 5. How dare you criticize me. I came to you because I need to get rid of a dog not get a lecture. I do so love the self-righteous who wallow unaware in their own hypocrisy to the amusement of those watching. So fans, I have been inundated with the morons and the obtuse and I pray daily for some mythical place of enlightenment, but for now, Ill just settle for finding a home for this sweet guy. Eeyore is 3 years old, 90 pounds, sweet, fluffy and full of mournful looks, but he is good with other dogs and people, possibly even the dumb ones. Interested parties should email elizabeth@bigfluffydogs. Those who know the location of that utopia of logic and reason should message me with the details where I can find such a place.
Posted on: Tue, 31 Dec 2013 06:07:18 +0000
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