Signs You Drink Too Much Coffee: - You answer the door before people knock. - Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. - You ski uphill. - You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. - You havent blinked since the last lunar eclipse. - You lick your coffeepot clean. - Youre the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you dont even work there. - Your eyes stay open when you sneeze. - You chew on other peoples fingernails. - Your T-shirt says, Decaffeinated coffee is the devils blend. - You can type sixty words per minute ... with your feet. - You can jump-start your car without cables. - Cocaine is a downer. - You dont need a hammer to pound nails. - Your only source of nutrition comes from Sweet & Low. - You dont sweat, you percolate. - You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel. - Youve worn out the handle on your favorite mug. - You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee. - You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize its not plugged in. - You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them. - Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down. - Youve built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers. - People get dizzy just watching you. - Youve worn the finish off your coffee table. - The Tasters Choice couple wants to adopt you. - Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house. - Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp. - Instant coffee takes too long. - When someone says. How are you?, you say, Good to the last drop. - You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can. - Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil. - Youre offended when people use the word brew to mean beer. - You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug. - You can thread a sewing machine, while its running. - You can outlast the Energizer bunny. - You short out motion detectors. - You dont even wait for the water to boil anymore. - Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale. - You think being called a drip is a compliment. - You dont tan, you roast. - You cant even remember your second cup. - You help your dog chase its tail.
Posted on: Wed, 30 Oct 2013 03:39:03 +0000
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