So...here is the crazy...I talk to a You that never ever answers. I dont expect him to. My calls to him are screams into the night air and the only thing that hears me are blacktail jackrabbits and the pollen of fall sage. He has not seen a word. Or heard a whisper from me in months. I walked away. Too many entanglements...but he plagues me...my dreams...my wake...fever and fits. Here I talk openly to him as I talked to no one else ever. No masks. I just am. But he isnt here and this is open for anyone in the whole world to view. Perhaps he will find his way here someday. He will be repulsed by the love. I cant believe otherwise because he lifted not a finger to fight for me...again the entanglements the complications. I strangely understand. So here...is my padded cell...my place of complete honesty...and where my love bleeds out. Someday I might be able to stop the flow...someday I might find a transfusion and be brave enough to plunge the needle in my arm. Someday I might just slide into Stegners Angle Of Repose and accept my life for what it is. Until then...the gypsy needs a spot of grass on which to dance.
Posted on: Thu, 18 Dec 2014 17:37:54 +0000
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