THE CHAMELEON FEMI FANI KAYODE A must read excerpt from an article written by Femi Fani Kayode on the 19th January,2014 titled JONATHAN,TUKUR AND A GOVERNMENT OF JEZEBEL If Goodluck Jonathan wants his fortunes and the fortunes of his party to change and if he wants peace to return to our shores he simply has to do twelve things. Firstly he has to resign as President forthwith and undertake to stay out of Nigerian politics for the next ten years and confine himself to fishing in Otuoke. Secondly, if he cannot step down, he must give a public undertaking to the Nigerian people that he will not run for re-election in 2015 and tell them that if he changes his mind and decides to do so at the last minute they should stone him. Thirdly he must go and prostrate flat on the floor with his face touching the ground before seven of the most respected and distinguished men in this country and tell them that he is very sorry for the mess he has created and he must refuse to get up until they swear by the Holy Bible or Holy Koran that they have truly forgiven him for destroying our country. Those men are President Olusegun Obasanjo, General Ibrahim Babangida, General Abdulsalami Abubakar, General TY Danjuma, General Muhammadu Buhari, Vice President Atku Abubakar and Asiwaju Bola Tinubu. Fourthly he must write an open letter of apology to the 36 Governors of the Federation, the Senate President, the Speaker of the House and the Chief Justice of the Federation for his manipulative ways and the gross incompetence and ineptitude that he has displayed whilst running the affairs of this country over the last three years. Fifthly he must write a letter of condolence and pay a token fee of compensation as restitution to the families of every single one of the 7000 innocent Nigerians that have been killed by Boko Haram in the last three years. Sixthly he must take off the kid gloves, stop interfering and give the military the green light to use all necessary means to prosecute the war against Boko Haram and he must win that war. Seventhly he must dismantle the death squads and the group of deadly snippers that he has allegedly commissioned to create havoc and he must tear up the list of one thousand opposition figures that he has been accused of drawing up for elimination by Obasanjo and others. Eighthly he must remove one Esho Jinadu who is better known as Mr. Buruju Kashamu (a rather strange name that does not have it’s origins in Yorubaland but instead sounds like a low quality brand of Indian tea) as the leader of the PDP in the south-west and honour the demand of the American Courts and the ruling of the Nigerian Federal High Court and Court of Appeal by extraditing him to the United States of America to answer serious charges of drug smuggling in that country forthwith. Ninthly he must direct his Ijaw supremacist kinsmen to desist from threatening the lives of other Nigerians that oppose his government and who keep threatening brimstone and fire and the dismemberment of Nigeria if he is not allowed to come back in 2015, Tenthly he must undertake to stop serving kai kai at the Presidential Villa and he must dispense with the services of one Mama Brandy, a well-known Ijaw ”prayer warrior” and spiritualist. Eleventhly he must pull down every satanic alter that may have been erected in the Presidency and consecrate and re-dedicate the whole place to the Living God. And twelfthly he must give a public undertaking that the other four Presidents that run this country with him and that act as his ”Co-Presidents” will also step down with him forthwith or, if he insists on staying till 2015, give an undertaking that he will fire them with immediate effect and bar them from playing any role whatsover in the running of the affairs of our country from now on. Those four co-Presidents are, in order of seniority, 1. Dame Patience Jonathan (the First Lady) 2. Allison Dizeani Madueke (the Hon. Minister of Petroleum Resources) 3. Stella Oduah (the not so Hon. Minister of Aviation) and 4. Ngozie Okonjo-Iweala (the Hon. Minister of Finance and the Co-ordinating Minister). President Goodluck Jonathan, even though he is the public face of the small cabal of co-Presidents that presently rules Nigeria and even though he is the one that was given a lawful mandate from the Nigerian people in 2011 to lead our country, comes a distant fifth in the pecking order. He is co-President number 5 and woe betide him if he crosses the line and tries to challenge the position or usurp the duties of any of his four seniors. That is the sordid and degenerate level that our country has been reduced to by this little man from Otuoke. Yet it is not too late. If our President can find the courage to take these twelve steps, peace will return to Nigeria immediately and our people will once again have hope. The problem that we have in our country today is not an ageing former Party National Chairman called Bamanga Tukur who has lost touch with reality, who never knew how to play the game and who did not know when to call it quits. And neither was it a set of tired and exhausted army commanders and Service Chiefs who did their best but who received no real and tangible support or encouragement from their Commander-in-Chief in the field of battle. The problem that we have is the President himself- a President who prides himself on his own weakness and incompetence and whose love of false prophets and strange women knows no bounds and has no end. A President who is as confused and as clueless as the comic character called Chancey Gardner in the celebrated 1970′s Peter Seller’s Hollywood blockbuster titled ”Being There”. A President who does not understand the meaning of the word ”class” or ”honesty” and who breaks his own word consistently. A President who has abdicated his responsibilities, destroyed his own political party, divided his own country, alienated his own friends, humiliated his own mentor, abandoned his own people, brought ridicule to his own faith, cowers before his own officials, betrays his own governors, scorns the international community and breaks his solemn oath to protect and defend the Nigerian people. A President who does not even have the nerve or the guts to call to order any of the numerous Jezebels that control him. He is the problem we have in our country today and until he resigns, is impeached or is voted out of power nothing will change and Nigeria will continue to go from bad to worse. That is what you get when you vote for a man who never wore shoes to school. Friends what do you think of Femi Fani Kayode.
Posted on: Fri, 16 Jan 2015 20:59:16 +0000
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