THE MOVIE INDUSTRY IS STAGNANT! A recent discussion made me think of how the movie industry has become stagnant. Either the writers lack creativity or the producers (money people) are too afraid to take chances. So were treated to an near endless barrage of remakes or reboots. So here is my humble list of... TOTALLY UNNECESSARY REMAKES (In no particular order): 1. Total Recall. Heres a movie that wasnt all that great in the first place, but made passable by some funny (intentionally and not) acting by Ah-nult Schwarzenegger. The new movie replaced the big name actor with special effects and watered-down plot. 2. Rollerball. While Norman Jewisons 1975 masterpiece couldve been greatly improved by some judicious editing, the remake was a clown car that kept endlessly unloading more and more silliness, replacing shocks and excitement with laughs. 3. Carrie. Purists can rightfully nitpick with the artistic license that Brian DePalma took with Stephen Kings book, but few can fault the incredible cast, acting and musical score. Why the burning need for a remake? The TV version was more true to the book, but lacked the stand-out music and performances. The most recent incarnation seemed to me an homage to DePalma, making it even more superfluous. 4. Star Trek. As much as I love J.J. Abrams, and Chris Pine as Kirk, not to mention Zachary Quintos portrayal of Spock, Karl Urbans great take on Bones McCoy and John Cho as Sulu (sorry, but the rest of the cast leaves something to be desired IMO), they shouldve taken on new material instead of blowing canon right out of the water. Im all for being adventurous and taking risks -- Abrams seemingly one of the few who DOES (and can convince the money men to go with him on it) -- but you just dont mess with a 35+ year-old franchise Willy-Nilly. Instead, he shouldve ADDED to canon, boldiy going where no Roddenberry or Braga had gone before. File under: Missed opportunity. 5. RoboCop. Okay, so the new movie had some decent moments. It had vastly superior special effects. It had more fleshed-out character development and decent actors to boot. It even paid homage to the original in very clever ways. But with all of that going for it, its an appendage; it broke no new ground and comes from the same file as Star Trek. 6. The Day The Earth Stood Still. My quick summary: BOOOO! Malevolent, rather than menacing. Keanu Reeves is a frightening monster as opposed to Michael Rennies curious and charming alien. Better special effects make the giant Gort a far more formidable power, yet at the same time less galactic policeman and more alien WMD. The first movie at least gave the visit a purpose: to warn us to change our ways for our own good. The second made the visit unnecessary, since the plan to wipe us out was proceeding anyway. This would be a great movie for The Ghoul. 7. Charlie & The Chocolate Factory (remake of Willy Wonka). The quick summary: WTF was THAT? Even useless appendages call it superfluous. Plus, nobody can replace Gene Wilder. Total crap. 8. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The holy grail of horror movies, we fans had great expectations for the 2003 remake. Its main flaw: no Tobe Hooper. He gave the original a sense of atmosphere and outright strangeness that is completely lacking in the remake. Hoopers choices for music and sound effects were masterful; the remake has no equivalent. The one bright spot: an appearance by R. Lee Ermey, the scary drill instructor from Full Metal Jacket who proves he can be equally scary AND creepy. In my opinion, hes the only reason to spend the time to watch this one. So thats my list. Got any to add? Let me know... with an explanation, of course. :)
Posted on: Fri, 21 Mar 2014 17:26:26 +0000
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