TOP IDIOTS OF 2014 - first quarter only !!! Top Idiots Of 2014 Number One Idiot of 2014 I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away. Heres your sign, lady. Wear it with pride. _______________________________________________________ Number Two Idiot of 2014 Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them. It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing. Heres your sign, guys. Dont get it wet; the paint might run. _______________________________________________________ Number Three Idiot of 2014 A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote this. Put all your muny in this bag. While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the tellers window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasnt the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, OK and left. He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America. Dont bother with this guys sign. He probably couldnt read it anyway. _______________________________________________________ Number Four Idiot of 2014 A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted, Nobody move! When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him. This guy doesnt even deserve a sign _______________________________________________________ IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD: I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I dont think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore. STAY ALERT! They walk among us .. and they REPRODUCE ...!!! _______________________________________________________
Posted on: Sat, 05 Apr 2014 13:40:32 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015