The Abandoned TGWTG Musical Idea - Act 1 Well, 14 reblogs, comments and likes (with support from the blogger who posted “The Critics Go To Hell” isn’t bad, so I guess it warrants you the fans to read this idea. Though note I changed a few things to retcon the ending of “To Boldly Flee,” but the musical, however, does not have Malcolm or Rachel since I wrote this before the NC made his return and before several members of TGWTG left this year and JewWario, who retired from TGWTG, had not left at the time I wrote this. - - Firstly, as typical of all musical programs that you get when you walk into the theatre, I’ll include the list of songs with the singer for that song that I had thought up but never wrote lyrics for: 1. Lovely/Lousy Chicago Morning - Nostalgia Chick, Oancitizen, Linkara, SadPanda, Chorus 2. My Dream Up in Lights - Nostalgia Critic, Paw 3. Snob or Ciniphile - Cinema Snob, Oancitizen 4. Welcome to Show Biz - Linkara, Rap Critic, Chorus 5. Options for Revenge - Diamanda Hagan, Minions 6. Every Musical Needs a Tap Dance Number - JewWario, JesuOtaku, Chorus 7. Rewriting Act Two - Nostalgia Critic, Paw 8. Here We Go Again - Todd in the Shadows, JewWario, Obscurus Lupa, Elisa Hansen 9. Duets Are Cliched - Linkara, Nostalgia Chick 10. Specter of the Musical - Linkara, Nostalgia Chick 11. Welcome to Show Biz (reprise) - JesuOtaku, Paw, SadPanda, Chorus -Intermission- 12. The Perfect Woman For Me - Film Brain, Film Conscience 13. Law School Ambitions - Obscurus Lupa 14. Back of My Head (Actual Love?) - Todd in the Shadows, Phelous, Linkara, Chorus 15. Snob and Ciniphile (reprise) - Cinema Snob, Oancitizen, SadPanda 16. Death of The Specter - Linkara, Nostalgia Chick 17. The Show Must Be Canceled/Go On - Nostalgia Critic, Obscurus Lupa, Paw 18. The Curtain Call (Critic’s Prayer) - Nostalgia Critic, Chorus 19. Who Gives a F*ck - Film Brain, Film Conscience, Diamanda Hagan, Chorus 20. My Dream Up in Smoke/The Curtain Falls (reprise) - Nostalgia Critic 21. Every Musical Needs a Grande Finale - Entire Cast 22. The End Credits (Buy Our Sh*t) - Rap Critic, SadPanda, Elisa Hansen, Chorus Still with me? All righty, here’s the story: Act 1 The musical begins with the opening song, "Lovely Chicago Morning" as the denizens of Chicago wake up and start the day. As they go about their day, The Nostalgia Chick walks through it all, singing along what a nice day it is until she runs into The Oancitizen. They make friendly introductions and question these orders sent by the Nostalgia Critic to gather all the TGWTG members together to a theatre as they hope it’s nothing sinister. As they walk on, the other members of TGWTG pass by the Chicago-ians who remember these critics for being the cause of much pain and suffering over the last 4 years: like the year they were attacked by Super Mecha Death Christ and Giant Donkey Kong Jesus, or the year they all attacked a micronation that set their economy back, or that year when they dressed up in silly costumes and disrupted the peace. But they never forgot the year they unintentionally opened up all these plot holes and risked the welfare of the planet. From bringing this up, the Chicago-ians change their tune and sing that “this is going to be a lousy Chicago Morning.” After the opening number, all the critics that were introduced arrive at this run-down theatre where the Nostalgia Critic (who is perfectly all right and ignores any questions about what happened to him last year, passing it off as “bad fanfiction”). Once all the TGWTG critics are settled (despite falling over in broken chairs) the NC announces he has no intention of taking over the world this year but wishes to fulfill his “secret life-long dream that came to me a few weeks ago”: to create a musical that would be up on Broadway. The Rap Critic asks “You want to go on Broadway, then why did you have us all meet in this old dirt heap?” The NC replies “Ya’ gotta start somewhere.” The Nostalgia Critic holds up a music book that he claims to have written, but Paw interjects saying he wrote actually wrote it and when he proudly called the NC about it, it went missing right after. The Critic ignores him and, through the song "My Dream Up In Lights," where the NC goes around the stage while Paw tries to get his play back, encouraging the others to help the NC. Despite Paw’s protests that this is his musical, everyone agrees to help out the NC, as they immediately get to work cleaning up the theatre and to practice their parts. Paw swears vengeance that he will get the NC to tell the truth but smugly agrees to participate with the musical. Still with me so far? Good, cause what would a musical be without some subplots to give the characters something to do instead of stand around? No, they have to have character development. Character Arc Subplot #1: The Oancitizen and The Cinema Snob, two critics who have been called similar, butt heads at each other, trying to prove who is better, of course, in song. “Snob Or Ciniphile?” A song that plays every time they butt heads or argue with one another, thought mostly instrumental. Back with the main story, the NC hires some rude, insulting, snobbish twerps as interns as he has Linkara and The Rap Critic give them a tour of the stage. The interns become bored so to keep their attention, the two break into the song "Welcome to Show Biz," which also serves to show through a comedic montage the work all the Critics do to the stage, from the wrong costumes, construction mishaps and dance practices gone disastrous. However, the interns barely pay any attention to the two as they spend all their time looking at their phones and despite an elaborate song, they deem them “lame.” Character Arc Subplot #2: The Interns insult Film Brain and Film Conscience and make rumors that they are gay for one another to get on their nerves. Wanting to prove that the interns are wrong, the two spend the entire musical trying to prove they’re straight, only to constantly get into hilarious awkward situations that only cements the rumor (ex. Film Brain falls from a ladder and Film Conscience catches him, only to land in an awkward position). During production, Dimanada Hagan arrives unexpectedly at the theatre, surprising the Nostalgia Critic that she is in America (her response being “I had to kill 15 international border patrol guards to get here and you don’t even want to know what I did with the bodies.”) She offers her services to help out but she becomes offended when the NC tells her he doesn’t want her int he musical or here in general. The rejection angers The Mistress as she leaves, plotting to kill the Nostalgia Critic in her hotel room with her minions. But this proves easier said than done as the minions keep offering her suggestions on how to kill the NC, from poisoning his coffee to drowning him in battery acid. It’s here that the minions and Diamanda perform "Options For Revenge"constantly coming up with ideas how to kill the NC. Eventually, Diamanda comes up with a brilliant idea: ruin the NC’s musical so that he will be so devastated that he’ll come up with his own way to kill himself, saving Diamanda the time to come up with a creative death for him. She sends her minions out to sabotage the musical as she sits in her hotel room watching “Hostel,” laughing gleefully. Meanwhile, as the sets and actors practice JewWario and JesuOtaku ask the NC where there’ isn’t a tap dancing number in the musical. When they learn the NC doesn’t intend to include one, stating “tap dancing died out with the 1960’s, along with dignity.” To prove him otherwise, they perform "Every Musical Needs a Tap Dancing Number," with an impressive tap dancing number. At the end, they stand there, panting hard as they wait for a response from the NC who just stares at them before he gives a nonchalant “Okay” and leaves J-Dub and JO standing there. Character Arc #3 Todd in the Shadows tries to convince Lupa to give him another chance but she rejects him, saying “at least Phelous pretends to care.” Looking for a way to win back Lupa, Todd consults “The Book of Cliches” and chooses “make romantic interest jealous” so he tries to win over the Nostalgia Chick’s heart again, but the NChick refuses, remembering how “horrifying” his face was to her last year and rebukes his efforts. Overseeing this, Linkara decides now is the time to steal the Nostalgia Chick’s heart since she isn’t interested in Todd anymore. As that goes on; Diamanda’s minions attempt to steal the only copy of the music book, only to get into a scuffle with the Nostalgia Critic that results in one of the minions getting killed by accident (an accident which the others just react to with a shrug) and half of the script being torn. This leaves the NC in a jam since he doesn’t remember what was written and he cannot simply re-write Act 2 or else everyone would know he didn’t write the musical. So he goes back to the still bitter Paw and, through reverse psychology and a duet, the two manage to spin ideas together that re-creates Act 2, only to have the Nostalgia Critic trick Paw and still claim ownership, further angering Paw. Todd’s attempts to win the NChick continue to fail as J-Dub attempts to talk some sense into Todd, without success, and Elisa Hansen, who was only visiting, overhears the entire situation and tries to talk Lupa to talk sense into Todd, also without success, all this frustration cues the song "Here We Go Again" as all J-Dub and Elisa voice frustration that this has happened again as Todd and Lupa also voice their own frustrations; with Todd being that he is actually having to pursue Lupa and Lupa voicing frustration that Todd is after her again. As that goes on, Linkara tries to make his move on the NChick but he learns that she suffered terrible trauma caused by Mechakara last year and tries to avoid letting Linkara get to close to her. This, however, doesn’t stop the two from at least trying to practice their parts, not helping is Todd constantly annoying the NChick. The Nostalgia Chick complains about having to do a duet with the Critic as she deems that it’s been overdone, thus prompting Linkara and the NChick to, ironically, perform a duet listing off duets between a man and a woman in musicals, from “West Side Story” to “Cats.” Linkara nearly wins the NChick until a flashback to MechaKara causes her to leave in fear of Linkara. Linkara curses himself as he looks over to the props and comes to the conclusion, if the NChick is terrified of his face, then why not follow in Todd’s example and hide it? Using the costumes and props he finds abandoned, Linkara creates the mysterious persona "The Specter of the Musical" (“It’s totally safe for copyright”) as he performs his song just after the NChick forces Todd to leave her alone. In this persona, Linkara wins the NChick over as he leads her down to the basement levels (which he didn’t actually know existed but he lucked out upon discovering a door that leads down there) to help her practice in peace. Meanwhile, The Rap Critic brings to the attention of the Nostalgia Critic that they have no music conductor. Although the Rap Critic offers to take this position, the NC sends Oancitizen and The Cinema Snob to scour Chicago to find one, bickering as they go. Paw returns with proof that the NC stole his idea, only to have one of Diamanda’s minions attempting to kill the NC miss and destroy Paw’s evidence, also getting killed in the process (Phelous commenting “This place is an even bigger deathtrap than Disneyland.”) The NC leaves claiming he needs to take a breather, JesuOtaku, J-Dub, Paw and SadPanda along with the chorus to reprise "Welcome to Show Biz" only get cut off when Todd runs out announcing the Nostalgia Chick has gone missing. Cut to Intermission. - - For fear of giving too much for the tumblr blog to process, I’ll post Act 1 now and then follow it up with Act 2 shortly after. Thoughts so far? Comments anyone? Good? Bad? Meh? Lobster?
Posted on: Thu, 29 Aug 2013 07:40:03 +0000
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