The Onion has a great response to the absurdity of the recent set of Navy SEALs all squabbling over who actually murdered Osama bin Laden. Its an unseemly set of disputes and not just for the usual reasons reported. What strikes me as unseemly is that everyone has forgotten the obvious: bin Laden was unarmed. He could have been taken and brought to trial. The decision to kill him and not make him pay for his crimes in a court of law was -- no matter who pulled the trigger -- an unseemly act of American cowardice. I think its obvious that neither the administration nor the Pentagon wanted to see him defending himself in a court of law, which meant cold-blooded murder (now held up as a heroic American act) freeing a criminal responsible for thousands of American deaths from having his day in court. The Onion has an amusing take on a most unamusing episode. Tom Describing the group as one of the most advanced and highly skilled special operations units in the world, sources within the Defense Department revealed Friday that the U.S. Navy had formed an elite new SEAL team dedicated solely to writing best-selling tell-all books. Speaking on condition of anonymity, sources confirmed that the task force was created earlier this year and that its members have undergone extensive training to prepare them to quickly and efficiently release popular accounts of covert operations in the War on Terror. The 32-man special forces team, assembled from the best autobiographers within existing Navy SEAL squads, is reportedly capable of writing firsthand narratives of highly classified missions under even the harshest conditions and within the narrowest time frames.... “These soldiers are equipped for whatever press request is thrown at them—they are fully prepared to deploy with 24 hours notice to give promotional interviews on nearly any television program in the world,” said a Joint Special Operations Command official who requested we not use his name, adding that the men are often only given a short briefing from their commanding officers to prep them for an intense sit-down conversation with a seasoned reporter, be it on Charlie Rose, 60 Minutes, or even The View. They have incredible levels of endurance. Oftentimes they’re sent out on book-signing tours of six months or more. Given the demands of today’s publishing industry, they may only see their family a few times throughout the year. “But the pressure of delivering one of the year’s best pieces of nonfiction doesn’t get to them though, the source added. These guys have ice water in their veins. Furthermore, officials within the Pentagon confirmed that, in addition to their traditional role as special ops authors, the men are also ready at a moment’s notice to carry out adaptations of their books into films or assist in the production of eye-opening documentaries when deemed necessary. “Few among us could ever endure what these men face on a daily basis, holed up in their empty rooms, cranking out page after page of their heart-pounding first-person thriller, said the unnamed JSOC official. We certainly owe them a debt of gratitude for the sacrifices they have made and their contributions to War-on-Terror literature. And as long as they maintain their silence, they do all of this without anyone knowing the remarkable efforts they’ve made. “These selfless individuals only care about one thing: ensuring that every single American has access to a captivating page-turner, he added. theonion/articles/navy-forms-elite-new-seal-team-to-write-bestsellin,37393/
Posted on: Sat, 08 Nov 2014 17:00:01 +0000
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