The U.S. Department of Agriculture has released an 80 page report which suggests tools to modify the ways that Americans select food. Big Brother wants to steer customers towards the fruits and vegetables and away from sugary and fatty foods........And wouldnt you know it, the FLOTUS is behind this little venture into our private lives. She has all kinds of good things planned for us......for our own good, of course. She doesnt want We the Little People to have to bother with silly inconveniences like choosing what foods we eat. So, Michelle the Militant has decided to do it for us...........Grocery stores will have talking shopping carts which will notify customers when they are choosing unhealthy foods. The carts will be color coded, and they will notify the customers when they have reached their threshold for healthy and unhealthy foods. Isnt that neat? Im not for sure, but I bet the shopping cart will even have a built in electrical system which will shock the customer if he is over his limit of unhealthy foods...kind of like an electric fence for cattle.........one too many candy bars in your buggy and ZAP. You wont make that mistake again...or maybe a flashing blue light with a siren will go off if you go over your limit of potato chips.......like Kmarts Blue Light special...........But it only gets better........Aside from the little cost of the talking shopping carts, which are priced at $30,000 per store, the supermarkets will be using the grocery store employees as ambassadors who will direct people to the healthiest food. (Oh, boy!) Aaannndd....each grocery store will have classrooms which will give cooking tips and government advisors who tell us how to eat healthy. Grocery stores will have to provide more shelf space for government preferred food..........But food stamp recipients are the luckiest of all. Because when their buggies have just the right number of healthy foods, they will be rewarded with free stuff such as FREE MOVIE TICKETS and discounts. Keep in mind, those perks will only be for food stamp recipients. Those of us that work are rewarded everyday with getting to go to work............Isnt it swell living in a country with such neat parents? Mommy Michelle and Daddy Barack are always looking out for us.
Posted on: Fri, 18 Jul 2014 19:48:09 +0000
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