The absolutes of Christ Centered Reality Therapy deal with Toxic Development and Complexity. It begins like this: Toxic people do toxic things. They always do and always will! Destructive people do destructive things! Destructive choices always leave a trail of debris for others to clean up. Angry people do hurtful, angry things! They cause pain and hardness of the heart. Anger and pain always lead to toxic, emotional bitterness. Evil people are the people who practice evil, who support sin and help forge the chains which place people in toxic bondage. They live to create death and destruction in other people: physical, mental and spiritual death. They are skilled at the craft of evil and well-practiced in wickedness. Selfish people steal from others. Selfish people exploit your life force to build their own. Selfish people control your time, money, freedom and joy. Abusive people take joy from your pain! They get their fix, their high, from your hurt! They are skilled at abuse: verbally, spiritually, mentally, and physically. They are supporters of the evil that men do! These evil people are the very worst part of the toxic equation. Toxic people who make excuses for other’s bad behaviors and bad choices are called enablers. These are the people who keep toxic shackles tight and secured on the victims. This is the toxic person who creates the most damage. If you are a toxic enabler, you are like the getaway driver from a bank robbery! You did not rob the bank or shoot the teller, but you drove your son, the bank robber, to safety. You even told him it was bad to steal and murder, but all the while you drove. If the toxic relationship predator does not learn how to handle his or her own problems, how can they ever be free from their toxic behaviors? Your rescuing excuses are disabling their success. Stop today! You are not God! You cannot heal, help, rescue, fix or excuse the toxic behavior any longer! You cannot be God to another person. There is a colossal difference between helping a person and carrying a person. If you are a Christian, the Holy Spirit lives in you; you are not now, nor will you ever be, the Holy Spirit. Toxic enabling in a relationship is when you feel singularly responsible for the toxic predator’s success or failure. If you could have FIXED them, you would have FIXED them a long time ago! To break free of toxic bondage, just like you, the predator will have to break free of the shackles of bondage and then walk out of Egypt (spiritual toxic bondage) on their own. The toxic predator must break free of YOUR excuses! If you are the victim, don’t fix it for them (the predator), or you will fix them flat. That’s how it works. You have to die before you can be resurrected, so until you have the power of God, quit reviving the toxic relationship! If you would let THE TOXIC RELATIONSHIP die, there is a small, however improbable, chance the relationship might resurrect to new life. If you are the victim, then you are the Toxic Enabler. You are responsible for continuously bringing the relationship back to life, and then you go buy it a beer. Understanding the Cure for Abnormal Toxic Reality Once abnormal toxic reality is set in motion and if left unchanged, it will not self-cure. Abnormal toxic reality will grow and manifest itself into a variety of symptoms, which can also be problems. The wants and unmet needs of abnormal toxic reality are clearly identifiable. Abnormal toxic reality takes on mass and form. The abnormal toxic reality is acted out physically, mentally, and spiritually.
Posted on: Mon, 30 Sep 2013 12:40:43 +0000
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