The more I think about it, this whole dream-chasing thing is beginning to closely resemble an early mid-life crisis. What began as a way into writing by dipping my toes as opposed to diving in, has morphed into a deceptively simple circumstance. I am at Square One. Without expecting or even desiring it particularly, a bright light has been shone on my life, revealing the dark corners to me, and I find myself faced with the challenge of reinventing myself. Now, because I can’t control the way my brain puts things together (the whole freaky drummer thing, remember), the image that comes to my mind when I think of the challenge I’m facing is that of Santa Claus packing his sack full of millions and millions of life-sized presents, large, small and everything in between. Imagine a bag that big! Imagine trying to tie up a bag whose volume is equivalent to 10 Hercules air planes. How will he pick up the enormous rope? Where will he find the strength to heave and heave until the bag is pulled closed? It’s impossible. That’s why he’s magic. It’s sick that I think this much about Santa Claus. But you see what I’m getting at here, right? Building myself from the ground up is a task of gigantic proportions. It encompasses far more than just this blog. I have reached a point in my life where a career change is imminent, and more than that, crucial. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am the prototypical university graduate whose university education landed her a great job at McDonald’s. Yep, I’m a walking stereotype. All schooled-up and nowhere to work. It’s what I’m known for, what I’m questioned about, teased about, and criticized for. It’s also what I’m tired of thinking and talking about. As unfortunate as it is, I can’t go back in time and I can’t change the past. What I can do however, is change my present to shape my future. Let’s go back and re-evaluate the Santa Claus scenario. It doesn’t work because the imagery is so heavy. Thinking of a sack so big that no one could possibly lift it evokes a feeling of hopelessness, so it’s really not useful. I can’t think of the task of rebuilding myself as one big thing. I have to break it down into chunks if it’s going to be a success. Five chunks sounds like a good start. If I work toward a goal in each category every day, I’m sure to see positive results. Baby steps, as Bill Murray says. Five key areas in my life currently under construction: 1 - Real-Life Career: Figure out what I want to do for the next 5 years. It may seem like a short period of time, but anyone who knows me understands that it definitely is not. 2 - Stability: See Point 1. 3 - Writing Career: Self explanatory. At least I hope it is by now. 4 - Organization: Two and a half months later and I STILL have 6 boxes of crap to go through. The real challenge with this one is remaining organized once I am completely finished with those damn boxes. 5 - Fitness: This is my broken record problem, but one I need to face, regardless of ennui. I think we all have aspects of our lives that we wish were a little neater. There’s nothing wrong with it - I think it’s perfectly natural, provided we do something about it. What are the things in your life that are sticking in your craw? They don’t have to be as dramatic as mine are – maybe you’re not in a very dramatic time in your life. It could be that you haven’t gotten around to cleaning out the garage or picking up the second language you always wanted to, or crocheting those little doll dresses that fit over the toilet paper. Whatever it is, challenge yourself to pick a couple of things that have been nagging at you and begin taking baby steps toward conquering them. You may as well. They’re not going to conquer themselves.
Posted on: Mon, 17 Mar 2014 08:30:37 +0000
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