These Past 6 Days have been a TRUE TEST OF MY FAITH!!! Last week Tuesday after being sick and tired of soooo much Hurt and Pain. I came up with a Suicide Plan. I was here alone and the DEPRESSION had consumed me so much until I was OVERWHELMED. Dealing with Life without my Shero. I wrote a Note and Revised my WILL and knelt down on my knees in my Kitchen with a Syringe and made a decision to END MY LIFE! . I had become Overwhelmed Mentally, Physically, and Emotionally. But GOD BLOCKED IT!!!!!! He wouldnt let me GO!. Wednesday Morning I had gotten up and journeyed to Manhasset, LI where I went for my routine physical and became extremely overwhelmed until they had no choice but to rush me to the North Shore University Medical Center/Manhasett Emergency Room. It was there that I laid in a Bed Lifeless Not wanting to Eat, Shower, Nothing!. Then I heard God Say.................My Child Go Find a Bible .....and I paged the Nurse immediately she then brought me a Bible and as I laid there in pain mentally physically and emotionally . I was reminded that EVERYTHING! !!! Works out for the GOOD! Of THOSE that LOVE GOD. That I wouldnt enter his Kingdom had I committed such act. So I picked up my Bed and I Walked the Hospital Floor for hours Praying to God until I noticed I wasnt walking alone. My Beloved Pastor Rev. Michael S.Corley came to see about my Safety and well being and Prayed over me and assured me I wasnt alone!!! On my Christian Journey. My First Lady Keisha Heard-Corley messaged me consistently despite her own . She too assured me I am Loved and my selfish act would effect many many people and or their Lives as well. So I begin to fight!!!!!! Then just as I felt I was strong the Devil attacked me yet again and I had a Lost Consciousness . Heart Rate was irratic and my Blood Pressure was extremely High. Then as I laid in Treatment Room. As I came too I heard a male voice singing Trust in The Lord...........Then Bishop G.E. Patterson Ole Ship of Zion as the tears rolled my cheeks unable to speak I looked to the ceiling and all I remember was the Art Therapist Holding my Hand saying Your Still Here!!! I laid there unable to move, speak, and she asked me if I needed anything and I slowly wrote Bible. She paged the Nurse to get my Bible and as the Nurse laid the Bible on my Lap and I flipped it opened exactly to Romans 8:18-consider that the sufferings of this present time are NOT WORTH comparing with the GLORY ABOUT TO BE REVEALED!!!!!. There wasnt a dry eye in the room. The Resident Physician didnt understand what was going on but I knew !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD was in the midst of it ALL!!!!!! IM BLESSED!!!!!!! To be ALIVE!!!! And Sunday God Willing I will have lived to see another Birthday. I thank God for my Praying Pastor and his unconditional Love guidance and support, and his Wife my First Lady my Confidant and my Friend Keisha Heard-Corley. Shawntablessedbbw Brown, Yvonne Melendez, Denise C Turner, Neil Lisby, Josette James,my Beloved Cousin Nicole McCray, Shai BoggieDeAndre T Banks, Nicole Oliver-EleyDeaconess Leatha Bouldrick, Antanice Stephens Miamore Orr My boo Taina Rodriguez- Nicholson Dopemommiofthree Pyatt Sis. Roz M. HarrisonSis. Perry Madea.From the bottom of my Heart I Thank You for your Love and words of comfort, love and support and ALWAYS! !!!!!!! ALLOWING me to Call or Text to Vent!!!!!! Again to my First Lady who had no idea as both she and I were Facebook Messaging I was trying to end my Life... Lady Keisha Heard Corley thank you for Listening and Not attacking me and understanding that this wasnt me looking for Guest to Attend a Pity Party and always reminding me To Trust in The Lord with ALL MY HEART . In ALL WAYS Acknowledge HIM!!!!! and HE! will make my Paths Straight!........I was discharged today and a ride thats 30 mins tops was a little over 2 hours. Im still somewhat out of it. I been told to REST!!! and LET THINGS GO!!!!!!!!! I Thank You ALL Again From the Bottom of My Heart............. Glory Be To God........Somebody Prayed For Me!!!! ..................Im Still Here!!!!!!
Posted on: Tue, 27 Jan 2015 00:58:15 +0000
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