Three years sober today. Who can believe it?? It’s certainly amazing to me. Half of you have no idea just how amazing that really is and the other half of you know EXACTLY how amazing that is. I still have a hard time getting my mind around it sometimes. Being sober is the single biggest decision I’ve ever made in my entire life. It hasn’t made my life perfect. It hasn’t freed me completely from sadness or anger or anxiety. It doesn’t lessen the sting of disappointment and it doesn’t make embarrassing situations any less embarrassing. It hasn’t made me better looking and it hasn’t given me a lot of the things that I still want out of my life. It has, however, given me a very valuable perspective. It’s given me the ability to finally be honest with myself (difficult as that may be) and start to value myself for what I can offer and to embrace the weak parts of me I still need to fix. I appreciate all the fantastically ordinary and beautiful things around me and I understand the effort it takes to live a simple and earnest life. I also can see very clearly the things that I’ll never embrace and the things that I’ll never cease to fight against. I can finally start to understand the space I’m supposed to fill in the universe. My skin fits better than it ever has. I own my life fully. All of it. The things that work and the things that don’t; the scuff marks and the bright spots; the little tragedies and the little joys. All mine. All the time. I’m beginning to understand what contentment is. To the people I respect that are reading this, I hope you know how much I respect you. To the people I value that are reading this, I hope you know how much I value you. Especially to the people I love that are reading this, I hope I’ve shown you just how much I love you. And to anyone reading this that feels even a little bit of any of that toward me, well, you’re the reason I made it this far. Any contribution you’ve made large or small, whether you knew it or not, has made a difference. It all mattered. If you’re sad I want to hear about it. If you’re happy I want to hear about that too. Life is too long to be sad all the time and it’s far too short to be anything less than joyful. If you’re at the end of your rope just reach out. I’ve got enough in the tank for both of us. Thanksgiving was the perfect time to choose life. I’m grateful to God for the people that were with me at my worst and for the people who have only ever known me as I am now. I’m grateful to God for His mercy and for the strength I was shown in the darkest and most isolated places in my heart. I’m not here to create belief I’m just here to tell the truth: God is real and I’m living proof. I hope that every year Thanksgiving continues to take on more and more meaning. More than that, I hope that I’m always reminded to be grateful every other day of the year as well. Not only for the joyful and rewarding moments in life but also for the pains and trials that chip away at my weakness and force me to get stronger. Phillipians 4:11-13 “Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” You guys are the best. Be good to yourselves and to each other. Now and always.
Posted on: Wed, 26 Nov 2014 13:15:27 +0000
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