WHAT ARE YOUR VALUES OR GAINS IN A RELATIONSHIP AND WHAT IS MY STAND! The Book of Psalm says we should number our days with wisdom- Ps. 90v.12. This wisdom nugget is not written to spite anyone or to speak to a specific occurrence past or present in my work, home or relationship. But it is a way of motivating people by speaking the truth surrounding challenges of relationships and expectations of partners, mentors and bosses using my frame of mind as a thesis and anti-thesis. Let me begin by declaring this: If giving food to a person or taking care of the house is a burden, it can be set aside because only sick, young and very old people cannot take care of themselves alone. Even poor people take good care of what they eat or drink often more than the rich who eat good delicacies and drink purified clean water often at the expense of their health and money. If performing your assigned duties or job in the office is what makes you sad or my role in making the office functional that is too difficult for you to bear, it is better you learn the tricks of the job, improve your work attitude and relationship or seek for a redeployment if you cannot cope. The Scripture says who shall not work cannot eat. Your livelihood is dependent on your self worth, knowledge and work ethics. You must acquire it. It is not sold in the market. You must be ready to work and work until there is no more work to do. The job you are doing as you like is what someone is looking for without opportunity to get it. So lessen your complaints and do the work. Earn a credible source of livelihood. For me, I can take good care of myself if people around me care less. I will do my work if people fail to do their part. Do I need to beg a child to cook or a staff to do his work? No. As you lay your bed, you will lie on it. If you see me working and panting, thinking, reading and writing or giving out my widows mite is a charitable or right thing to do, without completing it on your part, you cannot be wiser. Remember that everyone will eventually stand on their own and someday before their maker. You will account for those times you fail to do it right. You must therefore abhor the slavish mentality. Everybody must be able to stand for himself. If you are not ready to play your part, you should be ready to take good care of yourself without reference to others. Everybody eventually account for his actions and everybody must seek the means to provide for themselves when the need arises. Care and sharing is reciprocal. You care for what you value and you share what you have with those who matter to you. If making you happy is all you want from me, it is better to look for another good leader, generous family member or compromising partner. Better still, you can move to a new job, new home or family group where you can have what you need without question or playing a role in the life of people around you. For me, Life is serving yourself by serving others. I can only make you happy as best as I can, even if happiness and generosity is not a marketable product that can be freely sold or given. Happiness is a condition, a state of mind and an attainment that can be determined by time and space. It is not a daily or permanent product that can be bought, taken for granted and received. People must always remember that a partner or family member is human and has both expectations for what he or she does as well as limitations for what he or she can provide too. Everyone has many reasons to seek happiness and comfort alone or go to where they can get it without stress, if happiness is sale able and free on the market place. Sincerely, I have the disability to make myself happier than I am or to change my situation for better, until it can change. If I cannot be happier than I am, the equation is that I may not be able to make you more happier unless I have the strength and resources to do so. The implication of my confession is that everyone looking up to others should also brace up with the realities. There is no gain saying of the fact that success and fulfillment are not determined by our total happiness and comfort. Rather, it is a factor of the eagerness and commitment that we often put our task, responsibilities and activities in making our friends, close associates, partners, colleagues and family members to live positively and share selflessly each day. Then our hope for a better and brighter day is born with an heart of gratitude to God that we have an identity, a relationship, a source to share together and hope for future. Let us Think deep and think again about these things before we complain, nag or wreck our mind with unhealthy, confusing and miserable thoughts for no tangible reasons. Life is lived but once
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 06:47:02 +0000