WILL GOD PUNISH MY ABUSER? 25 Jan By Terry Loving Psalm 55:19 “God, who is enthroned forever, will hear them and afflict them–Selah men who never change their ways and have no fear of God.” One of my readers submitted a comment via my website, and graciously allowed me to post a public response. I am grateful. Thank you! …………………………………………. “Comment: I have been wondering far too often now if God will punish my abuser? I know it doesn’t make the past go away nor does it take away the pain yet I need some small comfort to know that he will be punished for hurting me, my kid and his child. Yet as I am suffering he is living a happy life. How is that right or fair and why is God not helping me and punishing him? I would like a reply please, thank you and God Bless.” …………………………………………. It is not uncommon to wonder if God will exercise Divine retribution on our behalf. When we are wronged, in the case of domestic violence and abuse for instance – it is only natural to desire revenge, even if it only comes from God Himself. We may not have the physical capacity to inflict pain upon those who abused us, but we often imagine someone else doing the job for us. And in numerous cases, the abused have male family members and friends that make sure the abuser is punished the same way he hurt their loved one. …………………………………………. Somehow we imagine that the suffering of former abusers will satisfy our souls. Seeing them with new loves and seemingly living happy lives infuriate us to the core – we think it unfair! Our thoughts continually are on the abusers, and awaiting the news that some tragedy has befallen them for the horrible things they did to us. Many abused persons keep in touch with friends and family of the abusers when the relationship ends. They may treasure those connections, however, they serve as a source of information – perhaps you were told the abuser fell down the stairs and broke his neck – “good!” …………………………………………. Speaking from personal experience, when my ex verbal abuser was stricken with cancer, I felt sorry for him. We had no contact for quite a while, and I certainly had no desire to rekindle any type of friendship. I was with a mutual friend when our paths crossed one day. As I moved on I learned to stop hating him, and focused on my kids and our future. When I saw him in person that day, it was plain to see how cancer was eating him alive. Funny though, I felt no need to rejoice, but hoped that he had repented for all the wrong that he had done. I wish hell on no one – it is forever. …………………………………………. While it is natural to feel anger for the abuse, we must not wallow too long on the negative. For our own sakes, both in the natural and the spiritual, we should acknowledge how we feel, get help if needed, and ask God to help us to heal and move on. Never should we seek revenge or try our hand at revenge for vengeance belongs to God alone: New American Standard Bible (©1995) “Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY,” says the Lord.” New Living Translation (©2007) “Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the LORD.” Deuteronomy 32:35 ”It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them.” Proverbs 20:22 “Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will deliver you.” …………………………………………. There are many more scriptures that speak to Gods’ wrath and vengeance – we must heed them for our own good. But know this, even when we think those thoughts in our hearts, we are displeasing to God. When God pays back, there is no jail time, no punishment from the law or getting sued. He knows what can happen to us, and that is why His vengeance is best – who can refute it? …………………………………………. When we assume that our abusers are living better lives, and are happy while we are miserable, this may not be the case at all. Of course they are going to put on a front for you. They are too proud to admit to making a mistake. That is why abusers come back many times. They cheat on you while beating you, but find that the other woman isn’t half the woman you are and they want to come back. Unfortunately, the abuse returns along with them. …………………………………………. It-Takes-A-VillageClick here to see more embroidered patches It is natural also to want abusers to suffer, especially if you are suffering – financially and in every way imaginable. It isn’t unheard of that an abused woman flees from her home and stays in a shelter while the abuser remains comfortably in the house they once shared. I would be angry as well. How could that be “fair,” for the woman and her child or children to be homeless and the abuser’s comfort zone has not changed – it happens. …………………………………………. When all we experience is anger and bitterness, we cannot see God and His Divine hand leading us. We can be so full of anger that He says “Go left,” and we go right. When we are consumed with God punishing the abuser for his evil, our minds are clouded, and we are not listening to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. We are on the mental frequency of hell, allowing Satan to fill our hearts and minds with thoughts of revenge. Therefore, we miss opportunities to move forward, and make better lives for ourselves and our children. It may be difficult, but staying in abuse in much worst. Millions of abused women have found new lives and new love by the Grace of God. But how can He work miracles in our lives when our hearts are stony and we keep looking back when He bids us to seek Him and look forward. …………………………………………. Rest assured that all abusers will pay for their wrong in some way. But also know that all human beings will stand before a Righteous Judge someday and give an account for the things that we have done on earth: Matthew 12:36 “But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.” Ecclesiastes 12:14 “For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.” Jeremiah 16:17 “My eyes are on all their ways; they are not hidden from me, nor is their sin concealed from my eyes.” Matthew 12:37 “For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” Romans 14:12 “So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God.” …………………………………………. We must not consume ourselves with anger and resentment, and learn to focus on Jesus Christ. He is our Hope in this dark world, and without Him, we can do nothing. God is a God of justice – He will set things right with the world in His own time: New American Standard Bible (©1995) “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD.” …………………………………………. “Comment: I have been wondering far too often now if God will punish my abuser?” Please leave this matter in the hands of God, and learn to trust Him. God is not a respecter of persons. He hates the sin, but he still loves the sinner. The sun shines on the just and the unjust alike: King James 2000 Bible (©2003) “That you may be the children of your Father who is in heaven: for he makes his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.” …………………………………………. “Comment: I know it doesn’t make the past go away nor does it take away the pain yet I need some small comfort to know that he will be punished for hurting me, my kid and his child.” Rest assured that in some way, your abuser will pay for what he has done, especially to the children. Your “comfort” should rest in knowing and trusting God. Let go of these thoughts so that you can hear His voice to help guide and direct your life. It is more important to know that you and your children are safe, and on the road to healing. Life will be a challenge for a while, but you will miss your miracle by clouding your mind with these thoughts. Let them go please. Surrender them to the Righteous Judge: American King James Version “God judges the righteous, and God is angry with the wicked every day.” Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” You may not see or experience this now, but you will – just keep trusting, serving and loving God with all of your might. 1 Thessalonians 5:24 “The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it.” …………………………………………. “Comment: Yet as I am suffering he is living a happy life.” You really do not know if “he is living a happy life.” You will only see what he wants you to see. And his new love, well, it is just a matter of time before she will experience what you have. Don’t be fooled by what you think you see. Focus on your own life, and rejoice that you are free. Work on freeing your mind, and you will experience life as you have never before. It does get better, and it is always “darkest before dawn.” …………………………………………. “Comment: How is that right or fair and why is God not helping me and punishing him?” Unfortunately, nothing in this life is “right” or “fair.” Life has uneven ways that boggles the mind, and often crushes the spirit. However, with Christ “all things are possible.” Do you believe? We have to desire the things that God desires in order to have true peace in this world. New International Version (©1984) “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” New Living Translation (©2007) “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” International Standard Version (©2008) “Throw all your worry on him, because he cares for you.” GOD’S WORD® Translation (©1995) “Turn all your anxiety over to God because he cares for you.” Matthew 6:34 “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:31 “So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?” Matthew 6:27 “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” Matthew 6:28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.” Matthew 6:25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?” Psalm 55:22 “Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall.” Proverbs 16:3 “Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.” …………………………………………. Forgiveness is on my list of topics to write about soon. For now, know that forgiveness is more for your sake, and not the offender. Also, forgiveness does not mean that you have to interact with those who have hurt you. It releases the shackles on your soul so that you can move forward – you can forgive through prayer. You can learn to love from a distance. But I will get back to this topic. In the meantime, I sincerely hope this helps. New American Standard Bible (©1995) “And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.” A WORD OF CAUTION: Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, And do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles; Or the LORD will see it and be displeased, And turn His anger away from him. Proverbs 24:17,18 Peace No amount of love will ever stop the abuse. “The punishment of the wicked is often delayed to a future world, and in this life they have almost uninterrupted prosperity, but in the end it will be certain. See Psalm 73:1-19. The punishment will come in the end. It cannot be evaded. Sooner or later justice requires that the wicked should be visited with the expressions of divine displeasure on account of sin, and in the future world there will be ample time for the infliction of all the punishment which they deserve”. Barnes’ Notes on the Bible ……………………………… “FORGIVE AND FORGET” – IS IT POSSIBLE? ……………………………… Why Men Abuse Women “Tony says it felt like he “blacked out” during the abuse. “You don’t understand what’s going on,” he says. “I completely own up to [what I did], but in that rage, it’s like your brain wires, they aren’t clicking.” “He says being in an abusive relationship is like being in a drug addiction. “It becomes like your bond in the sense that the woman is like cocaine inside of that relationship. That’s the only connection you have, because there’s no real love,” he says. “In order to overcome it, it’s almost like you have to separate, go to rehab, move out of the dope house and never come back.” youtube/watch?v=eLFbxbA0D14
Posted on: Sun, 12 Oct 2014 22:04:55 +0000
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