War done with words This war done with words, it doesn’t just happen as in all of a sudden. It gets noticed somewhere in mid-process. Maybe it is some previously learned technique but possibly an unconscious method. It is a forest-for-the-trees until it becomes perfectly clear. An old habit pattern yields yet another conclusion. This then gets feed to a somewhat noticing mind. And there it is, an event of verbal distinction. A storyline gets wrapped around its bare essentials. It is reiterated by word of mouth as another step but this is encumbering. Up from the depths it leaped with a ‘how come I never noticed this before?’ (Sure I noticed it before, dummy!) Am I the cause of it or the result? (We know but won’t say.) What has no beginning yet I always claim one? Who started this war done with words? (It was a war before words!) Is this a passive aggressive method of rejection or acceptance? How contradicted does it have to get for me to embrace it all as authentic? Is experience just a trail or trial of these kind of gimmicks? My awareness in these sorts of matters seems like some form of displacement. My expectations have a false entitlement. Most of my inner voices have tonal elements that are somewhat out of control. I am fooling myself by making sense of this idle blather. (Not really but maybe self-candid.) This is just war done with words. But I sip from this stream often as if it were a lemonade stand then look for bitter seeds to prove its’ authenticity. (A kind of negative grounding I’d guess). I drink from what already is said but only live in my palate of interpretation (tending towards bitter). I get my details all dressed up as ducks in a row. In my mind, I feign short stories for kids as my notion of false sincerity. In my hidden agenda behind the intention for arguing, I do, ‘being really interested’ as if it is a beneficent form of boredom. My listlessness is cultivated into a causal smile or soft yawn, just before my verbal launch. This is a war done with words and I am at the front of the booth, sipping my lemonade, inwardly watching my row of seedy ducks pass by!
Posted on: Tue, 24 Sep 2013 14:14:59 +0000
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