We are doing something rare and precious: talking honestly across the class/professional/occupational lines that traditionally divide doctors-nurses-patients-and-family into different pods, each with its separate language and argot, each with usually unspoken thoughts and fears. I think its hard for the doctors here to hear how much anger patients and families sometimes feel in the face of their powerlessness before death and medical bureaucracy, and of their ignorance of the true realities of their medical conditions and choices. This might even be compounded by the current Have the conversation and sign those docs, its all on you patients to fix this! PR campaign. Then we patients and families feel we have been mystified about the real unwritten rules when our DNRs etc. are ignored. That is why I feel its so important to talk in this group in I statements (as we call them out here in California.) I feel this, I am uncomfortable with this, when I hear X I feel Y. Its so important to me that we dont label, accuse, or paint ANY group with a broad brush -- (those arrogant docs, those ignorant patients, those families who cant let go, etc. etc. ) I want this place to feel healing and open and for nobody to feel or be attacked. What are your thoughts? Are we doing ok? (For those who want to explore further, I highly recommend the techniques of the Nonviolent Communication movement.)
Posted on: Thu, 16 Oct 2014 14:49:46 +0000