Welcome to the Cutting Edge Resort & Spa, home of the worlds finest iPhone 3 charging experience. A couple things to keep in mind during your stay: 1. If youre staying at our luxury hotel and dont have a cell phone yet, and your friend doesnt have a cell phone yet, and hes also staying with us, but not in your room, but youre both in your respective rooms at the same time, were proud to offer you operator-assisted room-to-room landline calls. Weve included the instructions in the middle of your bed for maximum convenience. 2. The electrical outlet is near your shin behind the headboard. 3. The Buddha lamp on the nightstand is battery operated, so dont worry about trying to find and reuse its outlet. Remember: The unenlightened traveler seeks the source of Buddhas power, and finds only himself. 4. To promote the open exchange of human knowledge, we have provided you with a bible free of charge. 5. You may also wish to access every scholarly work and literary tome and allegorical poem ever created by any man, woman or child since the dawn of human civilization. That will be $24.99 per night per online device, at premium biblical speeds. 6. Our hotels theme is hotel, and were proud to offer an immersive cultural experience. Please enjoy the interior paintings of the hotel exterior. Nobody explains your television better than your television, so weve left it on Channel 1. And if youd rather read, our in-room magazine offers an articulate chronicle of our artwork and television channels. 7. We know that you may have forgotten your toothpaste or your coffee maker, so weve placed one of these on your dresser and the other in the bowels of the hotel basement.
Posted on: Thu, 23 Jan 2014 03:25:53 +0000
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