Well, I thought it was funny: > The government has just passed a new law called: The affordable boat act> declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new boat, by April 2014. These> affordable boats will cost an average of $24,000-$124,000 each. This does> not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, insurance, fuel, docking and> storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.> > This law has been passed, because until now, typically only financially> responsible and working people have been able to purchase boats. This new> laws ensures that every American can now have a affordable boat of their> own, because everyone is entitled to a boat.> > In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable boat, the costs of> owning a boat will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way,> working taxpayers will pay more for something that other people dont want> or cant afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who cant afford to> maintain their boat will be regularly fined and children (under the age of> 26) can use their parents boats to party on until they turn 27; then must> purchase their own boat.> > If you already have a boat, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you cant).> If you dont want or dont need a boat, you are required to buy one anyhow.> If you refuse to buy one, you will be fined until you purchase one or face> imprisonment. For those that cannot afford one, they will get a free boat> with a monthly check for all ownership costs listed above at taxpayer> expense.> > Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the> desert, inner cities or areas with no access to lakes are not exempt. Age,> motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire are acceptable> excuses for not using your boat.> > A government review board will decide everything, including; when, where,> how often and for what purposes you can use your boat along with how many> people can ride your boat and determine if one is too old or healthy enough> to be able to use their boat. They will also decide if your boat has out> lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, or a> newer and more expensive boat. (Cash for Clunkers guidelines will be used).> > Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they> and their families can obtain boats free, at the expense of tax payers.> Unions, special interest and major donors are also exempt
Posted on: Sat, 09 Nov 2013 20:59:53 +0000
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