Well its been like forever since I stepped on the scale. And to my shock and amazement I have lost 8.2 pounds not sure how or if the scale is broken but for now ill let that feeling of accomplishment linger in my thoughts. Even if its not true.. . Food is such a powerful object in my life. Its such an addictive abusive ongoing obstacle. It makes me happy helps with sorrow, is my friendship when my fri3nds are missing. And calls my name from the kitchen when im rooms away. Its that late night rush when u need that sweet taste of creamy cold victory. However, its still that elephant in the corner, and the ticking time bomb that may take my life. Its my coping mechanism for pains that are haunting my brain. And the first thing I think of in the morning. It consumes my life most days. Lately i have been shutting it off with lemon water infused with strawberries or oranges(which actually sucks and is jacking with my sleep making all these extra stops to the restroom lol ) in the few short weeks of preparing my self for the 2015 overhaul of my body I have learned to fight back. Im taking control of my life one step at a I Am not sure how many of you remember my last flight with southwest and how they pulled me aside and made me feel inadequate about my weight. How mortified i was or how i cried the entire flight to Reno. Ruined my self confidence and destroyed my inner light. after many hesitating thoughts and back tracking we decided we would fly this year to Chicago. I cried while typing our information into the computer and even had to pep talk myself into the purchase. What that flight attendant did to me caused such horrible struggle within myself. I allowed her words to confine me and prohibit myself from living life. I have lost 36 pounds since that flight but now with the new one approaching I have about 30 more id like to shed. Its a conflict of interest when dealing with the joys of cooking and baking and fighting the urge to eat everything in sight but come hell or high water one day I will achieve my goals. Im praying it will be this year. I dont ever wanna feel like I did on that flight to Reno ever again.
Posted on: Thu, 22 Jan 2015 07:42:07 +0000
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