When I was a small child, my grandparents led me to church every Sunday where the message would be that only God mattered and every else was secondary. When my mother became wholly incapacitated, I was then taught that she was all that mattered and that what every my brother and I did in life was all to please her. It had the opposite effect than that which was desired, as I began to resent the fact that I mattered so little in the lives of my own family. When I married my extraordinary wife Bonnie, there was no question that she mattered, as this amazing woman wanted the very same thing I did: A place called home. When our daughter Rhiannon was born early, and consequently, suffered multiple serious health problems, I gave up my career to be her full-time coach because my little girl mattered. I found out to what degree when we lost her before the age of three; but, I had to work through my grief for I also had my son Christopher, who needed a Dad, and who also, in turn, mattered a great deal to his father. Everyones lives are filled with people who truly matter to them, as well as those who believe they matter more than they actually do. There are also those who attempt to push their priorities upon other as they are under the self-delusion that they know what is best for all concerned. Throughout my life I have had the pleasure of people who made a difference in my life and for whom I hold a great deal of affection and respect. Others have come and gone and, due to circumstance, have exited without fanfare never to return: They being more of a lesson as to how to choose my friends more carefully. The most important lesson I have learned in five decades of life is that, in one way or another, every human being matters to someone! During my life as an active scholar of history, I have met some truly fascinating people who participated in events I have only been able to study. There are people I have known with truly astounding artistic gifts: Some of which have gone on to various levels of success, while others became bitter and gave up. And I have also known my fair share of people whom I have loved who have destroyed themselves through either excess or a self-perceived lack of empathy. Each and every one of these people have contributed to the rich fabric of my own life; and, in turn, left an indelible impression, good or bad. From my students to my adversaries, I have learned something of value from each and every one of them. It is the vital reason I hold people close to me that I wholly disagree with: True friendship is worth the ride on the emotional rollercoaster that comes with it. For those who matter most in our lives are the ones who stand by us even when they think we have gone-off-the-deep-end; and, afterwards, are there when it is all over to provide companionship. And in our lives, that is all that really matters.
Posted on: Sun, 20 Oct 2013 10:23:58 +0000
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